Shadow Healer

Chp 17

Chp 17

Hitoshi would be lying if he said he wasn't nervous, because he most definitely is, nervous about being on television, at fighting with his newfound fledgling skills and strength, at possibly making a complete fool of himself.
at possibly proving all the bastards who ever looked down on him, hurt or abused him wrong, that he CAN be a hero, that he isn't a villain because of his Quirk and at the many racing thoughts running thru his head, at the fucking wait.

He's also worried because of said increased waiting since both security and hero's are suddenly patrolling the stadium much more intensely and no one is saying anything on why.

Hitoshi isn't stupid, no doubt something major has gone down that has got all the pro's and everyone else on edge, like maybe a villain snuck in or something but like hell if he knows or cares, he just wants to know if they are going to cancel or not.

They're not as after an hour, a whole ass half hour more then originally stated of sitting on pins and needles stressing out they finally announced the first match.

He's glad, since while he doubts he'd win Hitoshi still has something to prove and like fuck did Hitoshi endure all the pain and suffering, the complete lack of coffee, the fucking torture, that he endured watching himself get fucking ripped apart and eaten by bloody dinosaurs and weird ass monster bugs for nothing.

Sure Hitoshi also got to meet and train with Nokma, as strange, horrifying and amazing and awe inspiring as it was to find out aliens, that whole other galaxies and species, intelligent life with their own societies and cultures and languages so very different from humans actually existed.

While Nokma was a stern teacher with tough teaching methods, he was.. is also kind, gentle and holds wisdom far beyond anything in this world. That Hitoshi doubts he will ever fully understand the depth of his knowledge.

He was...is a good... no absolutely amazing teacher and mentor that Hitoshi is truly grateful he met the other, that Healer allowed him to meet such an amazing individual.

Grateful as he is Hitoshi is still resentful, still hates that he endured everything that he did, while he understands more about his only same planetary friend and his friends so called godly quirk thanks to the many, many talks he and Nokma shared... he still can't accept, doesn't want to accept that Hitoshi's worst lifelong trauma and his increased PTSD that he know holds was caused by his only friend.

He has gotten better with his resentment, he isn't ignoring him anymore, as much as it pained him to do in the first place because he knows it hurt him, Hitoshi knows how much it added to his confusion because he didn't, still doesn't know why Hitoshi wasn't and still isn't happy with him.

Which just added to Hitoshi's own pain because as fucked as it is he felt like he was punishing a kitten for scratching the furniture or a child for doing something they didn't know, that they have no idea is wrong.

Hitoshi couldn't pretend nothing happened though, couldn't stand being near or looking at him and being constantly reminded of everything Hitoshi suffered through.

Hitoshi is better now after the many talks with Nokma, he is back to looking for his best friend and hanging out with them, is back to treating them like a free crappy therapist, is back to feeling good when Hitoshi is with him.

He's still hurt though and Hitoshi doesn't think he'll ever get over that.

Forgive but not forget right?

——

Having won a match or two simply by trash talking his foes, because far as Hitoshi is concerned why waste energy when it's not needed, ESPECIALLY when he hasn't had near enough coffee, cruel as that makes him, because he knows that by not letting his opponents show off their ability to the hero's both in the stands and outside it he is essentially not giving them a chance to shine and earn a proper placement in the hero understudy program they are about to undergo.