2 kids

Stinging jealousy.

Alex.

Pushing the too familiar door open I inhale the too familiar smell of marihuana and sex. Each time I come back I hope to find the smells more distant, but the exact opposite happens. Each time I'm just reminded of how my life used to be.

Ace mutters something under his breath as he follows behind me. Neither of us break the silence as we walk further into the heart of this den.

We're not here to settle some old business with Cal. We're not here for a cup of nice tea or coffee either. We're simply here to pick up Ray. He hasn't been home in two days, as we've been told. Violet asked us to pick him up and bring him back to the dorm.

We find him being locked up in a small, dark and quiet room at the end of a small and dark corridor. Away from everyone else, all by himself.

There's an empty alcohol bottle laying on the floor by him, but no smell of alcohol lingering in the air. The only window here is too small to be able to provide enough fresh air and at the same time clear up the smell of whatever alcohol he's been drinking.

Ray's not passed out which is a good sign. He's not wide awake either. He's something between awake and half asleep. He definitely notices us entering the room, but I'm not sure he fully realises we've entered. I'm not sure he realises what it means that we've entered.

I wonder where Cal is. He's always let us crash here for a night if we needed, resulting in quite noticeable hate from everyone else. He always said letting us stay over one night doesn't harm anyone, but letting us stay over for more was off the table. It could give us the impression this is a hotel. We all knew what he meant and why he was against it, but it was just always much easier to pretend we were clueless.

Ace shakes his head and stares at Ray. I look around the room, trying to spot the light switch. When I eventually find it and turn on the light, the room gets covered in yellow light.

I exchange a look of despair with Ace and release a sigh. For the first time in months I feel like I'm back in the old days. There's nothing right now reminding me of our lives now. It's exactly as it used to be.

Is it too bad if I like it like this?

I squat down in front of Ray and call out his name a couple of times, increasing the volume of my voice each time. He opens his eyes at the third call, but closes them again immediately. I ask Ace if he has a water bottle or some liquid. The only liquid he's able to hand me immediately is an unopened bottle of what looks like the cheapest bottle of gin. Some third class gin Ray would never buy.

I examine the bottle for a few seconds, until I snap back to reality. Without hesitation I pour the too cheap gin over Ray. The gin is surprisingly cold like ice cold water, so it works perfectly.

His eyes flicker open within a second and his back is straightened as well. Confused about his whereabouts and surroundings, apparently also his company, he looks around the room.

Something must snap in his mind, either some realisation or memories of whatever has happened in the past two days, because shortly after he lets out a sigh and leans against the wall again, closing his eyes.

Ace breaks the silence. "Care to explain what the hell you've been doing here for two days?"

He doesn't answer him, he doesn't open his eyes or move. He remains leaned against the wall, completely motionless. I sit down on the floor; legs crossed and wait for him to regain his consciousness.

Under normal circumstances Francis would be the first one to bang on this door and demand an explanation from Ray. Actually, it was him who asked us to help him find him. When one of your friends disappears for two days, New York becomes surprisingly the biggest, yet at the same time the smallest city on this planet.