All I Want To Do...

... Is to be helped

Jaya dresses in some black jeans, a dull gray shirt, some sneakers, and a black hoodie, Jaya goes to school with Eleanor since Nalini let her stay the night. Her depression is kicking her ass and the meds aren't working. Eleanor called Nalini last night and Nalini is making her an appointment with Dr. Rogers to get new meds.

"You okay?" Fabiola asks as she meets Jaya and Eleanor as they're walking into the school for History class.

"My antidepressants I got last year aren't working anymore," Jaya says. "Depression sucks ass."

Fabiola and Eleanor kiss her cheeks before they go to class.

"When do you see Doctor Rogers?" Eleanor asks as they walk to Jaya's seat with her.

"After school tomorrow," Jaya says. "So today is going to suck."
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And she was right, the day did suck. She barely ate at lunch because she felt nausea with each bite of her chicken sandwich.

'The majority of Hindus are lacto-vegetarian (avoiding meat and eggs), although some may eat lamb, chicken or fish. Beef is always avoided because the cow is considered a holy animal, but dairy products are eaten. Animal-derived fats such as lard and dripping are not permitted. I eat chicken and fish quite a bit in curries and sometimes plain. I like milk and cheese, too.'

Fabiola and Eleanor are sitting with her since Devi is hiding. She heard what happened and she blames herself for Jaya's long-lasting depressive episode. She's avoiding her.

"Come on, Jaya," Eleanor comes, "eat more. I know you like chicken."

"I can't, El," Jaya whispers. "I can't..." She stands and leaves after emptying her tray.

"This reminds me of the episode she had before she got her medicines," Fabiola says. "I'm worried."

"Depression sucks," Eleanor says and Fabiola hums in agreement,
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Jaya gets a chocolate bar from the vending machine and watches as Devi tries hiding out. She can't help but feel mad at her. She's the one who talked about her being made out with by Paxton. She also yelled at Eleanor and Fabiola for no reason. Devi also accidentally started a rumor that she (Devi) and Jason have had sex even though they haven't.

Jaya wanders down the hall and she eats the chocolate and she goes to her last class of the day.
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Nalini goes to Jaya's room later and sees her laying there. She walks over and she wraps her arms around her niece, the poor girl.

"I'm going to move your appointment for sooner," Nalini murmurs. "I hate seeing you like this, Jaya."

"I hate feeling like this, Auntie," Jaya whispers.

Nalini kisses the back of her head and she goes to call.
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The next day during school, Jaya is sent to Doctor Rogers. He is a therapist. She talks to him, she opens up to him about her mother and her death, and how she feels about it, and how she's mad about how Devi is. She talks about Fabiola, Eleanor, and Jonah and their friendship.

"Okay. I am going to give you a new antidepressant because I agree with your aunt, the medicine isn't working anymore," Doctor David Rogers says. "But I want you continue writing in your diary and walking but if those don't work, call me at any time, okay? Or come see me occasionally."

"Do you have more time today?"

"I have the whole day free today," David says. "I had a feeling that when Nalini called and wanted you seen earlier, it had to be bad, so I moved some things around."

"Thank you, Doctor Rogers."

"Of course."
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Jays skips out on the sleepover Devi is throwing for Fabiola and Eleanor. She is writing in her diary to clear her mind. She'll be depressed for a few days until the meds finally start kicking in.
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Since she's still depressed, Jaya is upstairs while Eleanor, Fabiola, and Devi all bake with Eleanor's mom. She's looking through some Hindi cookbooks and she skims each page.
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Jaya eats some lactose-free muffin while grabbing cookies from Eleanor and her mom Joyce and a pre-packaged cupcake that Nalini brought. She walks through the hallways again as she eats her muffin. She goes to where her locker is and she sits down, she leans against the metal locker. She's missing the drama between Devi, Nalini, Eleanor, Fabiola, Fabiola's mom, and Joyce, and Devi admits she lied and that she's really a virgin.

Jaya is joined by Eleanor and Fabiola when Nalini and Devi leaves early. Jaya said she'll catch a ride home by a teacher or a friend since she's not the one in trouble.  Fabiola goes to rejoin her mom and Eleanor stays with Jaya.

"When will the new meds kick in?" Eleanor asks.

"Few days, maybe," Jaya says. She rests her head on Eleanor's shoulder and they just sit there.
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Jaya goes to school and she sits alone for a bit and studies on the couches since Paxton and his friends are sitting at a table. Jonah, Devi, Fabiola, and Eleanor soon join her and they study together. Jaya is still upset with Devi but they're talking again.
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When Devi is incited to Jason's house (where Paxton and Rebecca are with Jason and Jason's sister Kelsea), Jaya goes to comfort Eleanor because her mother bailed. Again. Jaya gets a text from Paxton.

Paxton: Wanna come to Jason's and hang w/ me?

Jaya looks at Eleanor and smiles. She texts him back.

Jaya: I can't. Eleanor needs me. Maybe we can hang out some other time.

Jaya puts her phone away and she walks over to Jaya.

"Who was that who texted you?" Fabiola asks.

"Paxton," Jaya replies. "He invited me over to hang with him and Jason and their sisters. I said no because Eleanor needs me."

"You're a good friend," Eleanor says. "Where's Devi?"

Jaya holds Eleanor as she reads the note that Joyce left for her daughter. She ditched her to go to broadway to start acting. Eleanor quit the play and she's giving up. Jaya opens up and tells them about how she didn't just kiss Paxton the one time.

"Tell me more," Eleanor demands, her eyes are still blood shot but she's calming down.

"We made out," Jaya says. "And he... touched me."

Eleanor smiles. "Oh, my God!"

Jaya smiles and she hugs both Fabiola and Eleanor.