LOVER |c.t.h|

FOURTEEN|CALUM|

DOUBLE UPDATE DAY! This one is going to hurt but I need you to trust me please.

WORD COUNT: 954

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CALUM POV:

OCTOBER 21st - 6:00 PM

Emery texted me, asking to meet up, she had something that she needed to tell me. I asked her if she wanted to meet at the spot and she immediately said yes.

I was happy that my spot was also her's now, it held such a greater meaning to me. She now has a space to feel safe and comfortable in that isn't her house or the studio, it was somewhere new and I loved it.

She was here before me, sitting on a big purple beach towel, smoking a cigarette, looking out at the water. The sun was setting, causing the sky to be painted a pretty pink and blue.

"Hey lovely." I greet her as I walk up.

She turns to me with a small smile on her face. "Hey Cal."

I take a seat next to her, pulling out my own toxic stick. "What's goin on?"

She sighs and looks back out to the sky. "I let go today Calum, fully let go of something that was pulling me down." She sounded so proud of herself, it made me even more infatuated with her.

"Oh yeah?" I raise a brow. "And what did the great Emery Rose let go of today?"

"A song." She simply says. "A song that I think I can grow to love."

"Who'd you give it to?" I knew she sold music only because I may or may not have googled it.

"Harry fucking Styles." She shakes her head.

My eyes widen in shock, "No way." I was so happy for her. "That's amazing Emery."

"I know, we bumped into each other at the studio after my appointment today and I could just hear Amberetta's voice in the back of my head telling me to let go, so I did."

I smile, taking the occasional drag from my cigarette. "I'm proud of you."

She turns to me, eyes glimmering. "No one has ever said that to me."

There goes my heart, breaking for this poor girl yet again. "That can't be true."

"Maybe they have said it but they have never meant it." She shakes her head.

I blow out a cloud of white smoke and smile. "Well I said it, and I meant it."

She looked so much better already but I know from experience that it had a time limit to it. Once she got rid of more things, she would start to feel lost again, therapy was a tricky mother fucker I'll tell you that much.

"I really think I can do this, Calum." She takes the final drag of her cigarette before putting it out and sliding it back into her carton.

"Yeah?" I say. "I think you can too. You're strong Emery, remember that."

"I mean us, I think I can try with you." She was so excited, I hated that I would have to ruin it.

"Emery, it's only the first day, give it time." I shake my head.

"You don't think I can?" She gets offended.

"It's not that I don't think you can."

"Well then what is it Cal?" She furrows her brows.

"Emery, these things take time, they take more than one day to work." I explain. "Everyone always feels great after the first day but it's just a placebo, you need to let it sink in."

She shakes her head. "Why are you pushing me away all of a sudden?"

"I'm not, I'm looking out for you, please just trust me." I plead with her.

"Today was a good day Calum, I am not going to let you ruin it by telling me what I can and cannot do."

She stands up and starts to walk away. She wasn't understanding what I was saying.

"Emery," I get up and follow after her.

"Just leave me alone." She walks a bit faster.

I grab her arm and spin her around, she was forced to face me. "You can do this, just not right now." I tell her. "Therapy takes time."

She takes a deep breath. "What would you know about therapy?" She spits in anger.

I let go of her hand. It wasn't like she meant it. I told her that Amberetta was just a friend that I have known for years. I never told her that she was also my therapist.

"You're right, what would I know?" I say shaking my head and walking away.

It hurt, but it shouldn't have, she had no idea about my issues.

"Calum, wait." She calls out. "I didn't mean it."

I stop at my car door. "You're right Emery, you may be able to do this but I can't, not with you."

I let the words slip out, I didn't mean to but they just happened and there was no taking them back. There are moments in time that you wish you could eat what you said, where you wish that you could take a remote and press the rewind button so that whatever you did wrong, you could fix it. This was one of those moments.

"Fuck you." She spits.

This was going to be one of those moments for her, I knew it was. Emery didn't have it in her to be a mean person, that isn't who she was.

"Have a good night." I say as I open my car door and get inside.

I hate myself, she was having a good day, a great day even and I went and ruined it. I should have just let her think she was ready, let her do what she wanted but I couldn't. My morals wouldn't let me.

I would rather her be mad at me for the time being than her hate me forever because I let her jump in when she wasn't ready.

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It's all out of love, I promise you that much. It's all in the name of character development besties<3

XOXO