Dreaming About You

Chapter 15: The Return Of His Past

KYUHYUN'S POV

If I must admit it, I'm really worried about Gwen. It's true that I may be confused of how I feel towards her like my sister but I still want to protect her like a woman to me.

I can't stay still with these thoughts and I can't do anything while the members were at our dorm. It's because when Shindong-hyung says that something is strange, definitely something is strange. It happened so many times that you would really believe that his grandmother is a shaman and it was passed on him.

Then the doorbell on our dorm rang. It couldn't be Gwen, she knows the passcode. Or did she forget?

"I'll open it." Eunhyuk volunteered.

"Wait! Don't-" someone hugged me and I break away quickly.

Qian? Why is she here?

"I missed you. Did you miss me too?"

Why would I miss her? I'm full of resentment and hatred towards her. It's true that I'm hurting on what she did because I still love her. But how can I love her again when I don't trust her anymore?

Dazed on what was happening, I decided to get out of here. I don't care where should I go, I just need to get out of here.

The moment that I went towards the door, my hyungs were holding her back so that she won't be able to follow me.

"Yah! Don't you ever think that I would stay still! I get what I want no matter what!" I heard before I closed the door behind me.

I still don't know where should I go but then I was reminded of Gwen. Good thing all of our vehicles has trackers which can be tracked by another vehicle of ours.

SHE'S IN DAEGU?! THAT'S ALMOST 3HOURS OF TRAVEL TIME!

Oh well, I needed that distance from here. I really need to get far away from here.

I'll just go and see if Shindong-hyung would be right. I might look like a fool right now but I hope that when I get where she was, I'll have to go back to Seoul because she doesn't need me there.

The car she used was still moving moments ago and now it stopped on a village. Not more than 15mins passed it moved again but it stopped on a rest area in a highway.

Good thing I was near her, only 5mins away. But I needed to exit the highway first and enter it again to be on the other bound.

I slowed down to look at the other side when I saw the car sma used and those passing were flickering their lights and honking their horns.

WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING? DID SHE REALLY LOST HER MIND???

Not long after I entered the high way again, the car she's using was moving again as I look on the GPS.

This time it stopped on a bridge. There I was on her tail. I also stopped and went to her. She was now on the rails of the bridge but it seemed like she has no plans of doing what I was thinking.

As I look closer, she was holding a puppy and she was playing with it like it was her baby.

I breathe a sigh of relief, seeing her like this. I went to her and tapped her shoulder. SHE SUDDENLY HELD MY HAND AND THE NEXT THING I KNEW WAS I WAS FLIPPED ON THE FLOOR.

"AWW! THIS WOMAN, REALLY!" I think I broke a bone or two. Why? Why would she used a martial art defense move on me??

We were now on a tent bar here in Daegu. She still held the puppy that she saved on the high way.

"What are you trying to do on the high way? Are you really crazy?" Just thinking about how she saved the puppy on the high way really makes me worried if she is really still in her right mind.

"I was just trying to save-"

"Okay, I understand but you shouldn't do that yourself."

She just drinks soju and eats tteokbokki without answering me. I held out my shot glass on her and she pour soju on it nonchalantly.

We drank 5 bottles of soju quietly. I think it's time for her to get chatty, as an effect of getting drunk. But she's still not saying anything.

I'm also getting drunk and I should not push it to limits if I want us to get home. I paid for the drinks and called a driver for the car she used and for the van that I drive.

I carried her and got on the van. Almost 2 hours passed she got up from my lap. Her eyes were closed but she was saying something,

"Am I really cursed? Is my life really damned? Why can't I be happy for once?"

"What are you talking about Gwen-ssi?"

"I thought he came to save me from drowning in confusion. I thought he's my destiny."

"That's why I don't believe in destiny." I whispered.

"But did you know? He was married with two kids! He didn't even told me that he married! If I was even a friend to him he should have told me that from the beginning! Am I wrong?"

I was shocked on what she said. I even supported her to meet him up even though she should be working for us during our group's practices. I even gave up on unraveling these thoughts which concerns my feelings for her.

"I don't know how to react earlier when he introduced his wife to me." she started to cry. "His kids was just so adorable that I couldn't help but be happy for them. I don't know when it will sink in to me. Like how? How would I accept it? It's just that I can't really find my place under the sun."

Then she turned to me and cupped my face by both of her hands.

Don't tell me she's doing it again? Is this her drunk habit? She would kiss anyone whenever she's drunk?

" You know I'm always dreaming of you. Whether I'm awake or asleep, I always dream of being with Super Junior. It's a dream come true for me but why do I feel sad? Why?"

Tears flowed from her closed eyes. "Its because I know that one day I will wake up from this dream. And like a fool, I will just continue dreaming of you, to make the impossible, possible."

When we arrived at the dorm she was sound asleep. I can't carry her because I was also slightly drunk. Good thing, Eunhyuk-hyung was still awake.

"What happened?" he asked after arriving at the car park.

I just shrugged my shoulders, because I'm not the one to tell what happened to her. I don't even have the strength just to think what happened.

When Eunhyuk-hyung lay Gwen on her bed, I told him to rest already. He might be really tired for the day, since I know that he can't sleep whenever I'm not home and he doesn't even know where I am.

After drinking water to sober up a little, I went to her room to check on her. On her bedside I put the hangover drink so that she could drink it immediately after waking up.

When I looked closely at her she was silently crying. This made me feel something inside telling me that I should not hurt her nor make her cry. I wiped her tears on impulse. I felt that I could really not stand seeing her crying. Right now I can sense that I'm determined to sort my feelings out so that she won't be confused anymore.

"Keep on dreaming for now. Let's make your dreams come true, " I whispered. Then I kissed her forehead. The light was dimmed but I can see that she smiled a little. And it also made me smile.