Woe it's Wenclair

Accidents

Enid

"Bro, you okay?" Divina asks, poking me with the handle of her fork.

"Huh? Oh yeah." I respond, smiling at her.

"Does this have to do with the fact that you're sitting like, forty seats away from Ajax?" She questions, popping a grape into her mouth.

We're all sitting at the dinner in the quad. Divina sits to my left, and Yoko to my right. There's an array of food on each table, from steaks to creamed corn. I don't think anyone's eating the creamed corn.

"Actually, no."

She raises an eyebrow.

"Damn okay, dump his ass, queen," She laughs.

"No. Firstly, never say that it's weird when you say it, and secondly, I didn't dump him."

Yoko chokes on her grape juice and starts laughing hysterically.

"Yoko shut the fuck up," I growl through gritted teeth.

"Bitch, you dumped him and you know it!" Yoko chuckles.

"Quiet. Down." I retort.

"Damn, what did he do?" Divina asks.

"Nothing." I sigh.

"That's tough. I mean like, go off, I guess."

"No. Shut up, Divina." I sigh, rubbing my forehead.

Yoko gives a mischievous smile.

"She dumped him because she's crushing on Wednes-"

Without thinking, I jump up from my seat and cover Yoko's mouth with both of my hands, growling.

This seems to make quite the disruption. The tables around me quiet down to a whisper.

Holy shit.

"Damn. Also, your fangs are out." Divina whispers.

Fuck.

I look down and notice that my fangs are indeed, biting down on my bottom lip. I quickly pull my hands from Yoko's face and use them to cover my own mouth. This is when I notice I've spilled all of my grape juice on my dress.

"Fuck." I mutter, tears forming in my eyes.

"Sinclair?" The principle calls, heading over.

Of course I've disturbed the new principle, a couple of tables over.

"Yes?" I ask, weakly.

Everyone is still watching.

"I think you should go and get cleaned up." She says.

No fucking shit.

"Yeah, I'm going," I reply, swallowing.

The tables have started to calm down, and now only the people around us are hushed.

I sigh and hurry away, trying to not cry or look like I'm having the mental breakdown that I am indeed having.

I try to think of what my therapist told me to do when I feel like this, but all that comes up is breathing deeply. I know we talked about more, but I just feel so bad and I can't remember anything.

When I reach the dorm door, I throw it open and lock it. Wednesday isn't in her bed, so I assume she's out doing her own thing.

"I swear to god, I hate that principle." I mumble to myself while pulling my arms out of the straps of my dress.

I pull it down to my stomach while grabbing a pajama shirt.

I hear a sound and turn around.

"Are you oka-"

It's Wednesday, standing in the doorway of the bathroom, face flushed pink and eyes wide.

Holy shit.

"Oh!" I say in surprise.

My face turns tomato red as I cover myself up, very glad I was wearing a bra under this.

Slam. The door is pulled shut.

I'm going to have a fucking heart attack.

Wednesday

I stumble back into the bathroom, breathing heavily.

I try to go through the events that led up to this. I go to the bathroom, Enid slams open the door, complaining about the principle, I go to see if she's okay, and I find her half naked.

Shouldn't be such a big deal. We're roommates after all.

It wouldn't be a big deal if nothing happened over the summer.

I'm shaky, looking at my reflection in the mirror.

My whole face is shaded pink, my eyes are wide, and there's a burning feeling in my stomach. I do not enjoy this.

I grab the sides of the sink to steady myself. The interaction keeps replaying in my head. So does what I wasn't meant to see.

So it's settled then. There's no lie I can possibly tell myself to make believe I only admire her.

There is something much, much, more potent about this. The way she laughs, that intoxicates me with a feeling of contentment and peace. The way she cries, that fills me with a deep passion to do anything so that the tears stop falling.

There's what I've been familiar with. Her face, her lips, her beautiful blue eyes. Her soft and warm hands capable of any destruction. The fact that she chooses to be gentle when she can be anything.

At first, I saw that as stupidity and weakness. I believe now that who she is, is the strongest a person can be.

Then there's what scares me. The burning in my stomach that I've never felt before. Her shoulders, her collarbones, the angelic curve of her body. I admit, I'm terrified. I want nothing but to be with her, and it scares me to my core.

After all, if I mess it up, will I want nothing at all? Will I have nothing?