Woe it's Wenclair

Good enough

Wednesday

Okay, I don't know what I was doing. It was just... like her face... it was all red and cute and ugh, I don't know. It was stupid, I shouldn't have done it, but do I regret it? Not particularly.

If I knew I would call anything 'cute' a few months ago, I would stab out my eyes and bury myself alive. But here I am, balancing two plates and a hot chocolate up the stairs to my shared dorm.

"Thanks, Wens!" Enid smiles as I push the door open with my foot.

"Wens?" I ask, setting her plate and hot chocolate in front of her.

"Oh! Sorry, did I say that? I didn't mean to."

"It's fine." I shrug.

"Really? So I can call you Wens?"

"You can call me whatever, Enid." My eyes shoot open, after realizing what I said. "I mean, I guess you can call me that, not in public or I'll kill you."

"Okay..." Enid says, raising an eyebrow. "You got me hot chocolate?"

"Well I got us food and you have hot chocolate in front of you from me bringing in the food, so..."

"Very funny."

"I'm not trying to be funny, you just ask stupid questions."

"Rude." She says, crossing her arms in front of her.

"If It's true, it's not rude. Eat your food."

"That's not how that works."

"That's how it works with me."

"I'm sorry, I forgot you're special and different." She says, rolling her eyes.

I stab a piece of her food and bring it to her mouth. "Eat."

Enid glares at me the whole time while she bites and chews her food. I drop the fork on her plate, sit back in her bed, and eat, glaring as well.

She kicks her feet, whining. "You can't glare at me, yours is scary. I feel like you're gonna stab me to death."

"I'm scary?" I grin.

She shrinks back. "Maybe a bit, yeah."

I set my plate on the floor without breaking eye contact with her.

"Just a bit? Are you sure?"

I can feel adrenaline rushing through me at the idea running through my head, so I get on my knees, my heart beating fast.

"Uhm. Ye-yeah a bit." She nods.

I lean down on my fists, on the left and right side of her legs tucked in the blanket. She starts to breath heavy, the blanket on her torso moving up and down.

"Only a bit? What about..." I trail off, reaching into my blazer pocket, and pulling out a knife. "Now?"

Her eyes travel to the knife and she pulls the covers over her chin. I start crawling towards her, before saying, "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?"

Her eyes just widen. I push her tray to the side of her bed, moving closer to her until my arms rest at the sides of her shoulders, knife resting next to her head. I slowly sit down on her stomach. She immediately covers her mouth, face going beet red. I use the opportunity to pull her blanket down from her face.

"You're trapped," I mutter, pulling out my knife and resting the dull side across her neck. She gulps, the knife bobbing up and down as she does.

I attempt to say something, but I just open my mouth only to close it. My head is spinning and I'm breathing heavily.

"Wens..." she whispers, hand reaching up and pulling at my tie.

Bats flutter in my stomach at the sound of my name against her lips. Her name for me.

"Enid I..." I don't know what to say.

I just feel so...I want...I want to...

But it's selfish.

I hold the knife up from her neck and drop it to the floor, clattering loudly.

"I'm not..." I try to say, looking everywhere but her face.

She touches my cheek, sending heat throughout my body and forcing me to look at her. She stares at me with a sad look.

"You're not...you're not what?"

I lean back, sitting on her lap, and she sits up, resting on her palms.

"I, I want... I want to..."

She looks at me, waiting.

"Whatever it is, please tell me, I just want to understand." She says.

I pause. She deserves to know. She's always deserved to know.

"I don't do emotions... but I... want to... I want to do this." I admit, looking down.

"You do? Well then, then why..." She asks, her eyebrows knitted in my peripheral vision.

"I want to... I've always wanted to be... with...with you."

She doesn't say anything, I don't look up, because if I do, she'll see the tears in my eyes.

"Enid, I'm not...good enough," I whisper.

"What?" She asks, voice shaking.

"You know I'm not. And I was too much of a coward to say it, and I guess that's what I am... and I hate myself for it. I swore I'd be a good friend for you... now look at me. I can't do... anything right when I actually care. I'm s-so sorry." I admit, digging my nails into my arms.

I feel cold tears slide down my face, and I don't care this time. I bring myself to look at her and regret it. She looks at me with such sadness and confusion, and to know I caused the sun to dim, it's too much.

"What do mean, Wednesday?" She mutters quietly.

"I... I'm not a good friend... I'm not a good person."

"What the hell are you talking about?" She asks, putting her hand under my chin. "Of course, you're a good person. And you've been a great friend to me."

I shake my head back and forth, shutting my eyes.

"Hey. Listen to me. I know this kinda stuff is hard for you. But I can obviously tell you're trying, and you're so good to me. So don't try to tell me that you're a bad person, because you're not."

"I find that hard to believe," I mutter.

"Well, I'm always right." She laughs weakly. "But for real, I think you are. I know you are. And I want to be... with you."

"You do?" I ask, looking up at her.

"Of course I do, Wens." She says smiling.