How You Really Are | Jearmin

Part 2 | Chapter 3

Monday mornings had somehow gotten even more unbearable for Jean.

Last week he had already started all this but that didn't take away from the scariness.

Every day before going to school now he had to think about getting up early, taking boring classes and stupid comments from his classmates.

When he entered his classroom that morning the first thing he saw was Louise holding some pamphlets.

"Jean, I was looking for you." She approaches him. "Here, it's from a talk we're going to give." She hands him one of the copies and the brown-haired leafs through it for a moment.

"Is this some kind of religious thing?" He frowns. "Sorry, I'm an atheist." He tries not to sound rude. "I'm sure Nicolo is a believer, if you're looking for people."

"It doesn't matter if you don't believe, it's more or less the point, we seek to guide people. Give it a chance," she asks.

"Eh, excuse me but..." He scratches the back of his neck. Those things really didn't interest him and he didn't want to promise something he wouldn't do.

"Please, we really hope to reach people like you," she interrupts.

"Atheists?"

"Homosexuals," she says.

Jean's chest automatically tightens at that word.

"Maybe homosexual relationships are fine in the eyes of men but in the eyes of God they are an abomination. Since they do not reproduce it is unnatural. Many people are not aware of this due to lack of learning about the religion. Please let us help you."

He had to fight every instinct in his body not to start telling her why she was talking bullshit.

Armin is right. She is deeply rooted in her beliefs, anything Jean tells her won't change her mind, it will make him waste time and extend this conversation hearing her justify her way of thinking which would only make him feel worse.

He shouldn't do it, he shouldn't do it. Let her live in her ignorance, it wasn't going to change anything about him.

"Louise, just know that no one is going to listen to your fucking religious propaganda. We're in a secular school." He hands her back her pamphlet and goes to sit in his chair immediately.

Well, it was the best that could be managed so far.

"What did she tell you to make you look like that?" Sasha asks, sitting across from him.

"The usual." He rolls his eyes. "I'm sick of religious people, they're crap," he blurts out, venting a bit.

"Hey, I'm religious," says Nicolo.

"I'm talking about the religious nosy and idiots," he snaps.

"Did she say something to you because you're gay?" Connie asks.

"Connie, I already told you I'm not gay." He looks at him, annoyed.

"Oh, were you serious? I thought it was an excuse because you didn't want to say it yet."

"Why wouldn't I want to say it if it was? By now everyone knows I'm not straight."

"Makes sense, you don't look gay. Although I didn't think you were bi either," he says.

"Connie, stop it," Marco says.

"What, did I say something wrong? You know I'm glad you got to say it but it was unexpected for everyone."

"Yeah, I know that." He crosses his arms.

"Don't listen to Louise, a lot of people use their religion as justification for their hatred, that must definitely be a sin."