An Unexpected Turn

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"Kara?" Lena steps even closer to the blonde woman perched on the white, spinning bar stool. Warm hands grasp Kara's, snapping her from her reverie. "Are you okay, Kara?" She bites her lip, her heart throbbing painfully in her chest. As Lena revealed her intentions to hurt Kara, each word felt like a fresh crack in her already broken heart. Her stomach churns, all thought of even trying one of Lena's homemade potstickers thrown out the window as she processes her emotions. She's hurt, of course. But beneath her pain, she recognizes her anger bubbling. Kara swallows, trying to suppress the red emotion that's beginning to boil out of her mouth.

"I'm fine, Lena." She removes her hands from Lena's, sliding off the bar stool. She begins to move toward the door, trying to leave before the situation escalates. Lena grabs her arm.

"Wait, Kara. Where are you going?"

"I should go." Kara doesn't turn to face Lena, but she can picture the crestfallen look on her face. Looking at the raven-haired woman would break her resolve. She's too hurt to let herself fall back into the arms of this woman right now. She needs some space.

"I don't want you to," Lena whispers, releasing her hand from Kara's arm. Biting her lip, she turns to look at Lena. As predicted, Lena looks disappointed at the way this is going. What did she expect? "Please, Kara. Stay." Lena's near begging now, but the whine in her tone makes her snap.

"You want me to stay? Why should I, Lena? You threw me out when I told you my biggest secret." Kara throws up her arms, the anger boiling to the surface now. "You broke my heart, Lena. I tried to heal, tried to move on, but now you're telling me that all of your actions up to this point have been to hurt me even more? What am I supposed to say or do with that?" She watches as Lena shrinks away from her, wrapping her arms around herself.

"Kara... I'm sorry, please." Lena's voice cracks. For a moment, Kara feels guilty for snapping. But it's quickly replaced with the pain and anger she's felt for months.

"Do you even love me, Lena?" The question takes Lena by surprise. Kara can tell by the way Lena's eyes flick to hers while she fidgets against the counter. When Lena hesitates, Kara's heart shatters. Blinking rapidly against the tears forming, she spins around, stalking to the balcony. She pauses, half expecting Lena to stop her, half expecting herself to break down. Taking a deep breath, neither happen. She throws open the balcony door, the cool night air hitting her warm cheeks. The tears begin to fall as she walks toward the railing. She turns, expecting to see Lena still by the counter, but she's right behind her. Startled, Kara moves backward, her lower back hitting the rail.

"Can we talk about this, Kara? Please?" Lena doesn't move closer, but she reaches out to brush a few stray tears from Kara's face. More than anything, Kara wants to lean against her hand, feeling comfort in the midst of her pain. She doesn't though, simply standing there, back against the rail, arms hanging by her sides.

"What's there to talk about? It's clear you don't love me. That this has just been a game to you." Kara looks down again as a fresh wave of tears springs to her eyes. She quickly wipes at them, trying to keep her resolve.

"That's not true! Kara, you have to believe me. It's not a game to me. It never has been. I..." Lena trails off, swallowing hard.

"Then tell me you love me, Lena. Tell me that everything you did to intentionally hurt me was because you love me." Kara crosses her arms now, staring at the taller woman in front of her.

"I...I can't," Lena's voice breaks, her chest heaving with a sob. Kara shuts her eyes tight, a few tears escaping from beneath her lids. "I can't....because I'm scared. Kara, I'm scared that if I tell you that I love you, it just gives you a chance to hurt me in ways I haven't even thought about." Half of Kara wants to wrap her arms around Lena, soothing her. The other half wants to jump back off this balcony to never see Lena again.

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