🖤 Emotions♟ | angst 💔 | Zosan 💚💛

2 | Notice me

Sanji coughed and wheezed as blood and vomit fell out of his mouth. He couldn't breathe, he tried to keep as quiet as possible so no one would check on him and see the awful state he was in. Sanji coughed up the last bit vomit and stood up before flushing it down, hiding the evidence. He was too weak to even rinse his mouth out, so he just wiped his face and left the bathroom. Sanji's hair was becoming darker at the roots, he constantly wore something to cover it, even if it was hot as hell outside. 

"Sanji! I'm hungry!" Sanji heard Luffy shout from outside. Sanji frantically put his hood up and wiped his wet, red eyes.

"I'm coming Luffy!" Sanji shouted back, his voice cracking. He walked out of his room and entered the kitchen.

"Hey Sanji!" Luffy said, smiling warmly.

"Hey Luffy, do you want anything in particular?" Sanji asked, forcing the corners of his mouth to lift and make a weak smile.

"Meat!"

"Aha, I thought you'd say that." Sanji replied before getting to work so he could make his captain happy. 

...........................

Zoro watched from the window as Sanji slaved around the kitchen,  Zoro could definitely tell something was wrong with him. His energy had completely disappeared and every smile he made was fake.

"Zoro! Food!" Luffy shouted to him. Zoro sighed and walked into the kitchen before taking a seat next to his captain.

"Thanks swirly brows." Zoro mumbled. It gave Sanji a shock, he wasn't expecting any sort of gratitude from Zoro.

"Um, your welcome." Sanji stuttered.

Something is definitely wrong with Sanji, I'll ask Chopper to keep an eye on him.

..........................................

Sanji could barely walk from eating so little, all of his roots were black but no one had noticed. He lay on the floor in his room, wishing he could disappear. And that was what he was going to do. Sanji was fed up of living, and his dad was going to find him soon enough. He didn't want his crew that he loved to be in danger because of him. 

Sanji stood up, the sudden movement making him dizzy and nearly fall back down. He opened his door and slowly walked out onto the deck. The moonlight shone beautifully on the water and made the night sky glimmer. And how Sanji wished he were part of the ocean, forever sweeping gracefully up the rocks on islands and witnessing every battle on the water. 

Sanji walked to the railings and leaned down to look at his reflection on the water.

God I look terrible

He used all his strength to stand on the wooden railings before throwing his arms out to the side and staring out to the distance.

Haha, if I'm dead that means Germa won't find me. I'll rot at the bottom of the ocean and everyone will just think I went missing, they wouldn't mind if I was dead anyway. It was nice to know you, Luffy, Zoro, Usopp, Nami, Robin, Chopper, Franky, Brook. I hope you will be able to find another cook for your crew.

Sanji stepped off the boat and crashed into the cold water below, he embraced it instead of fighting it. He felt himself slowly drifting away from reality as he lost consciousness.

...

I'm sorry.

...

I'm sorry for not being good enough.

...............

To be continued.