All Of My Silences Will Be Your Words [English Vers. - FINISHED]

Chapter Twenty-Two

Two months later - South Korea

- Sae-Jin Lee !

I stood up, feverish and nervous, and approached the small desk from which the lady had called me to let me know it was my turn. I said hello and sat down in the chair intended for me, while she asked me what I wanted.

I took a deep breath, as Felix had taught me, and launched into it without further question.

- I'm looking for my parents. I began.

- Do you know their first and last names ? Or any other information, such as occupations, marital status, close family...? Asked the lady, already starting to type on her computer.

- Yes, but my information is a bit... Old. I don't know if this will help you. I explained.

- We can try, but I can't guarantee anything. Start with what you know and we'll see. She replied, glancing at me through her screen.

I nodded slowly, taking another deep breath.

- Madame Yoo-Mi Lim. Saleswoman in a clothing store. I announced, trying to control the inevitable tremor in my voice. And Mr Gi-Jae Lim. Truck driver. I suppose they're married since they have the same surname, but I'm not sure.

The lady nodded and settled for an "um, um" before dipping her head into her screen to search for my parents. I waited, tapping my finger on my knee. I'd always known my old surname and my parents' first names. After all, I'd been abandoned at the age of eight. I remembered certain things, even though I'd always preferred to keep these memories to myself, out of anger, because I'd been abandoned and there was no point in remembering all that. That was also why I'd thrown away my necklace. Why keep that physical reminder when it wouldn't change the fact that I'd spent more time in an orphanage than with my family ?

I never thought I'd ever want to find the people who'd abandoned me. I never did. Before I met the Lee family, all I wanted was to forget my past, and wipe the slate clean when a new family came along. And that had indeed happened : the Lees had opened the door of their home to me, and I'd learned so much more in such a short time !

And I'd never imagined I'd fall in love... So now that I was back in my native country, starting to get the hang of the Korean language and my days with Felix were simply great, memorable and romantic (his best proof of love was when he agreed to taste my hamburger/hot chocolate mix), there was one last thing I had to do : come to terms with my past. Make peace, get answers or whatever. But to be able to close that chapter and move on. To no longer be afraid. To talk, to live, to be happy. To just be me, instead of defining myself as a lonely, abandoned orphan.

- Soooo... I have an address.

I looked up at my interlocutor, full of hope and apprehension. An address ? Really ? With so little information ?

- It's not your parents, tempered the lady, seeing my expression, but I think it's someone in your family. Perhaps one of your aunts, if I'm not being silly. Would you like the address ? I don't think I can do any better, unfortunately.

- That's very good, thank you ! I reassured her, accepting the paper on which she'd written down the address. I didn't think I'd get much when I came here. Thanks again for your help.

- My pleasure. Have a nice day.

- Thank you, you too.

I greeted her and left, still in shock at having such a big piece of information in my possession. If this person really was a relative of mine, I'd be able to trace it all the way back to my parents.

My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I picked it up when I saw who was calling.

- Hi !

- Wow, you're in a good mood ! Felix's cheerful voice remarked. What's the occasion ?

- I've got an address ! I announced, all happy. One of my aunts, apparently.

I heard him whistle in surprise.

- Wow, that's impressive ! It's even more than you expected, isn't it ?

- Yes ! I think I'll go there this afternoon, so I'll be back in time for tea. I announced.

- No problem, I'll be back around the same time, so we can eat together ! Call me if you have any problems, okay ?

I'll smile.

- I will.

***

- Good news ? ChangBin guessed as Felix returned with a big smile.

Felix nodded, putting his phone back in his bag.

- Yes ! Sae was able to get an address to locate his family. Maybe it's one of her aunts. he announced.

- Too good, she must be relieved to have found something ! Are you going to go together then ?

Felix shook his head and wrung his hands, visibly annoyed.

- No, she's going this afternoon. I thought we were going together too, but I guess she wants to do it on her own. Which I understand, but I must admit it's stressing me out.

- Have faith in her, insisted Chan, who had been listening to them in silence. If she didn't feel up to it, she would have told you, wouldn't she ?

Felix pondered these words, aware that his friend was right. Nonetheless, his concern never left him.

- You're right, he finally replied. I must be worrying for nothing.

His two friends changed the subject to relax him and make him laugh, which worked, until MinHo and JeongIn entered the room noisily, a look of panic painted on their respective faces.

- We've got a problem, blew JeongIn, looking pale.

- Felix has a big problem, MinHo corrected, grimacing.