In the Shadows (Mattheo Riddle)

chapter 21

It had been exactly two days since I punched Daphne in the face. It had been exactly two days since I left my room. I wouldn't even talk to Pansy, and god knows she tried so hard to talk to me.

I just couldn't. I was dealing with the fact that I had actually fallen for riddle, and the fact that I fell so hard that I punched a girl in the face. She wasn't the first girl I punched, far from it. But she was the first girl I punched over a boy. And it did not feel good.

As I stayed, wrapped up in my blankets I had realized that all my classes I had the following morning, Mattheo was in. This made my skin crawl. I couldn't look at him. In my mind, there was no way he didn't feel anything towards me, you don't do what we did with someone you feel nothing for. But then again, you don't go and sleep with someone else if you have feelings for someone. My head was torn in a billion different directions and thoughts. I needed fresh air.

It was well past lights out, Pansy was out cold. I thought about waking her to come talk a walk with me, but I wasn't ready to speak to her yet.

I snuck out of the common room, and headed for the astronomy tower. I loved going up there. Seeing all the grounds, and the wind always felt the best up there. I wandered the empty halls, making sure I didn't get caught.

I finally made it up, I walked straight for the edge and took a seat. Dangling my legs, resting my head on the bar. Who knew fresh air could feel this good.

I sat there for a while, just staring off at the black lake. A part of me wanted to jump off, so I didn't have to feel the pain of falling for a riddle. Just as I was getting up, I heard someone approach the landing

"sorry, I didn't know anyone was up here" I heard the voice say

I stood to leave, "No! Its fine I was just leavi-" I stopped.

It was Mattheo.

I adjusted my sweater and went to leave, trying to push past him.

"Amelia wait" he pleaded, grabbing my arm.

"stop calling me by my name." I growled back. "I have nothing to say to you Riddle." I shook my arm our of his.

"Well I do!" I could tell by the look in his deep brown eyes, he wanted to me stay and hear him out.

"I don't give a fuck about anything you have to say to me to be quite honest" I showed no emotion behind this sentence. Because I really didn't.

"Just listen to me anyway, she didn't mean anything to me I swear!" He threw his arms up, almost in defeat.

"You don't owe me an explanation, we aren't anything, I clearly meant nothing to you either and thats absolutely fine!" I felt my self starting to break again. I couldn't let him see me cry.

"You know thats not true Amelia! Its different!" He said inching closer to me.

"It is was different you wouldn't have fucked her! You fucked up, not me!" I couldn't believe I was standing at the highest point of hogwarts, arguing with him about who he fucked.

"I know I fucked up! And I'm sorry okay! I am so sorry, I never ever wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry!" He grabbed my hand.

"Well, you did. Now live with it." I whispered, swatting my hands out of his.

I walked away from him. I couldn't ever forgive him for doing that to me. He played me like a damn fool. And it worked. I fell for his stupid mind games. I was the one at fault, but I was going to make sure, he never had me again.