In the Shadows (Mattheo Riddle)

chapter 22

Classes that week were brutal, as well as the weeks to come. We sat next to each other, or at the same table in every one. I couldn't even look at him. I felt his eyes on me so many times. I knew I couldn't look into his eyes, his eyes were the kind you got absolutely lost in.

Everyday after classes all the boys would hand me their work to do, and he would try too. I would accept all of them, and drop his right on the floor in-between us. I knew Theo or Enzo was still giving him my answers, but I physically didn't want to do a thing for him.

No matter how many times I tried to change my corse of thought, my head always landed back on him.

I wondered what we could've been, if maybe I didn't dance with that boy at the party. If he never would've fucked Daphne. I wonder how my weeks would've looked different.

He constantly left me notes on my bed "Talk to me please" "I'm sorry Amelia" "at least make it to dinner to eat please" and finally "I miss you."

I distanced my self dramatically from the group. I went back into my shadow self, just known as Draco's sister. I stopped attending parties. I couldn't bare to hear his voice, to join in on conversations with him. I couldn't look at him, let alone see him with another girl, which was no doubt what he ways doing at these parties.

I would admire him from across the room, I hate to admit it. I missed him too. I missed hearing his laugh, or his stupid stories. I missed seeing his smile, and the smile maybe I was the only one to see. I missed his soft lips, and his soft fluffy hair. I missed him. Too much.

I decided it was time to break my silence. After all, I came to Hogwarts intending to make my self known, as my own person. I wasn't going to let him stop me.

Pansy sat on her bed, staring at what shirt to wear to the party this evening.

"You wear the white one, and let me wear the black one" I mumbled

"No way! Your coming?!" She was nearly jumping up and down.

"I am, I am way over due for a drink" I giggled.

She was so excited, the smile never left her face. "Im happy to have you back, Lia" she muttered during a hug.

"Im happy to be back, pans" I smiled.

We made our way down, I was nervous as all hell walking into this party, but I couldn't lock my self away any longer.

The boys went nuts at the sight of me.

"Shes baaaaaackkkkk!!" Enzo and Theo screamed at the same time. I couldn't help but laugh, I missed this.

The party was definitely a good one to come back too. Everyone was there.

Mattheo wasn't in his usual seat on the couch, but I spotted him by the drink table. I wasn't so lucky, I thought maybe he wasn't here.

It was a very enjoyable party. I had a nice buzz going, the boys were their typical goofy selfs and I was having such a nice time.

I felt Mattheos eyes on me, and crossed paths with him a few times. He had the smallest smile on his face, like he enjoyed seeing me happy again.

I sat on the couch, my legs over Theos, laughing uncontrollably about a joke he was making about Daphnes face right after I had landed her. It was pretty funny how that I look back on it.

I felt good, everything felt right again, I could do this. I just had to steer clear of him.

Mattheo had asked us if anyone else had wanted another drink, me not realizing he was the one who even said it replied, "Ill do another!"

He just nodded at me. And walked off to the drink table.

I got lost once again in conversations with Regulus and Theo, until I had realized way too long had gone by and he still hadn't returned with my drink.

I turned my neck over the couch, to see him at the drink table, with his arm around Daphne, cheering her for a shot.

I had to options, go knock her again or get up and dismiss my self.

I chose the better of the two.

I felt as if I couldn't breath. I didn't understand how he could be putting in so much effort to just have a conversation with me, to do this the second I come around.

I knew it. I knew it was all an act. He didn't change, he didn't realized he was wrong. He was the same arrogant asshole I've known him be.

I stood up off the couch and just walked off. I couldn't be there any more, it wouldn't have ended well for anyone.

Tears were now filling my eyes, everything was blurry. My breathing wad getting difficult. I missed a step or two for sure. All I had to do was make it to my room, and I could be a mess all I wanted.

My door was now in sight and the tears couldn't hold themselves back any longer. When I heard his stupid voice.

"Amelia! God dammit stop walking now!" He shouted after me.

"No you stop!" I now turned to face him. Tears rolling down my face, struggling to catch my breath. "I'm not in love with you anymore!"

He stopped in his tracks. "I didn't know you ever were."

Truth be told, I didn't know either.