Producer's Corner

Chapter 25

"Who's that?"

-------

Chan freezes at the words. He didn't want to out Kiki, but now he has no idea how to answer the question. He could feel Kiki tense even more as her breathing quickened. And now he wasn't sure if she was about to go into a panic attack.

"Crap." Is the thing he ends up saying.

The person raises an eyebrow at his answer. "Crap? I don't think that's that person's name."

Chan rolls his eyes at the comment. Of course that's not her name; who the hell names their child 'crap'?

But before he could comment on that, Kiki grabbed onto the back of his shirt. Her fists clenched onto the fabric. He was still able to feel the shakiness in her hands. If he wasn't so focused on her, he wouldn't have heard the barely whispered sentence.

"It's so hot." At first, it was hard to understand her through the short breaths she was taking. But when the words were finally processed, he realized she was, in fact, having a panic attack.

"Crap!" Of course, Chan knew that wasn't helpful. Yet he wasn't sure how to work her out of a panic attack. He didn't know what helped her focus or if touching was okay; he was way more lost than he usually is when helping through panic attacks.

"Crap? Chan, is everything okay? You seemed more panicked that time."

His thoughts raced through potential solutions, and when he found solutions, he would come up with backup plans. He thought of all the grounding techniques he read about after some of the members experienced panic attacks.

"Okay, Jisung, I need you to listen to me. I know you have questions, but right now I can't answer them. I need you to step out of the room for a minute or so."

Jisung's eyebrows furrow. He himself was confused by the whole situation. Who was Chan hiding? Why did he need to leave the room?

"Why do-"

"Please! I will answer your questions, but this is important. Just step outside for a minute; I'll bring you back in when I'm done. And please, don't mention this to the guys yet. I'll tell them when it's time."

If anything, that just left him with more questions. Even so, he knew better than to push for it. He could hear the panic in Chan's voice—the sternness he only uses when something is really important and it's no time to joke around.

Not only could he hear the panic in Chan's voice, but he could also hear the short breaths the person behind Chan was taking. He knew what it was like. How, no matter how many breaths you're trying to get your body to take, you still feel like you're suffocating.

"Okay." Is what Jisung decides to say. He turns away from the duo and makes his way out of the room. Making sure to gently and quietly close the door.

He wasn't sure if he wanted to focus on the situation or on something totally different. But for now, he'll wait.

Chan gently pries Kiki's hands from his shirt and slowly turns around. He takes in the state she was in. Her eyes were screwed shut, her fingers digging into her palms. How hard it seemed for her to breathe. Her face was red, and she started to sweat.

He took a deep breath and tried his best to focus on her. "Kiki? Can you hear me?" He can't bombard her with questions, so for now he'll ask ones that will help her.

In response, she shakily nods her head. "I- it's so hard-"

"It's okay; you're doing great."

"I feel...d-dizzy."