secrets.

Chapter 11

When we went to work the next morning we did exactly what we planned to, walked in holding hands. "Awhh omg you guys are so cute !!" Hen says, smiling at us. "HA I knew it !! I want my 20 bucks hen, cap. Pay up." Chimney shouts. "Excuse me?" I say. "We bet that yous would come out soon, chimney was closest to exact time it would take." Bobby said, handing chimney his 20. "You guys are the worst." Eddie jokes. "So those hickeys, those weren't girls where they." Bobby asks. "No." I say, ashamed. "Don't be embarrassed baby." Eddie says, "yeah, but Eddie you practically ate his neck I mean look at the state of both of you" chimney adds. "Alright shut up." I say, shoving him. "Who already knew" hen asks. "Chris and Athena." Eddie replies. "How did they know first." Bobby asks. "Chris we told yesterday and Athena we told that day we had dinner at yours, I was upset and Eddie was comforting and she figured it out." I said, I felt so guilty about the whole sick thing still. Before they could say anything, we got a call out. It was a major fire downtown, we where first there and put it out, 0 fatalities. 2 injured 20. With a few cuts.

The rest of the day was calm, nothing major. I went home that night alone, I FaceTimed Eddie and Chris "hey guys!" I said, I missed them. "Hello baby" "hello Buck!!" "How are you guys." "We're good, about to watch a movie, you?" "Yeah I'm good. Missing you both, I'll let you go watch your movie, night babe, Night kiddo." "Goodnight!!" When we hung up, I felt a wave of loneliness come over me. I wanted to be there with them, cuddling Eddie, watching movies with Chris. I missed my family. I showered, got ready for bed and just lay in bed for hours until I finally fell asleep.

The next morning I headed into work, I wasn't going to see Eddie until tonight because he had a day off. "Hey Buck, are you good son." Bobby asked me. "mhm" I say, I wasn't fine at all, I didn't eat last night either. "Cmon your not with him for one day and you go emo?" Chimney says. "Shut the fuck up its not about that." I snap, then I run down the stairs and hit the gym. I use the gym as a distraction from my mental health. I worked out so hard I nearly passed out. Bobby came down and stopped me. "Talk to me Evan. Now." He said, "I'm fine dad." I snapped, I tried going back to working out but he grabbed me into a hug and I couldn't help myself from sobbing. "I feel so lost. Empty. Unloveable." I sob. "I hate myself more than anyone knows and I guess everything hit me like a ton of bricks when I was alone last night." I add. "Hey hey shhh it's okay kiddo, your safe with me. I love you so much. You are loved, and you are my beautiful boy." Bobby said, "ignore chim when he's being a prick, if you need time, take time. But always talk to me, I don't want you doing something stupid. Did you eat last night?"  Those words go through me. No. I didnt. But I couldn't say that, so I lied, "yeah, I did." I hated lying to him, but I didn't want a fuss. "Good, now go hit the showers quickly ." And so I did.

That night I headed to eddies at about 10, I knew Chris was in bed so I grabbed him and smashed my lips into his as soon as he opened the door. "Okay baby I've missed you too." He said, hugging my waist and pulling me inside. I jumped onto the kitchen counter, "im hungry, may I have toast?" I ask. "Of course you can mi mundo." I made my toast, and ate it. Once I'd finished Eddie grabbed my waist and kissed me. "Babe I've just ate." I say, "idc, I missed you." He said, reconnecting our lips. He pulled me closer to him and he ripped my shirt off. "Upstairs?" I ask, he grabs my off the counter and we run upstairs. I pushed him onto the bed, took his shirt off and started kissing him all over his body. One thing lead to another and we had sex.

After we where done, and showered, we climbed into bed and watched the vampire diaries (shock). We cuddled all night until we drifted off to sleep. I decided I wasn't going to tell him what happened in the gym today, as I didn't want him worrying about me.