Meet Captain Rhetoric: Hit Man for Literacy and Longing.
Known to get loose without the juice, a comma crazy kamikaze, always on the verge of spontaneous literary combustion, he'd make the sounds of words that ought to be, but weren't.
With fragical, rusty eyes and a zip lock heart, he bellowed upon entrance, "Hardy, feathers!" to the question marked faces gathered in the gloomy room.
Someone snickered, "He stuffs."
Captain Rhetoric sniffed and turned, ready to say "Sirloin" and exit this Yawn and Yacket Club. Instead, he explained, "Shut up! I'm here to clear your streams of consciousness, tame your various mood-ons, so listen up. In this sandpaper reality, if you're not an iceberg hermit, you'll need a magnetic expression to make the right impression."
Captain Rhetoric in his purple wonder-wear and "Bullshit Works!" t-shirt was the master of S & M conversation: ear-whipping and tongue-tying any audience. One could almost hear the wind blowing inside those seated as he spoke.
His stained glass eyes found and focused on a solitary gal drinking her solace juice nervous behind the fountain of the dessert table.
"Thunder nuts and bolts, Ice Queen! Come out and be seen. I sense your spark and my flame need joining. Come be my strawberry love. I shall be your whipped cream dream, the cream of spirit you have long hungered for."
The woman, flooded with feelings, emptying somewhat through her misty eyes, alternated ears listening to keep the neon heat at bay, squeaked, "I'm a lousy subject for your poetry."
"That's okay my love, I'm a lousy poet. All we need now is some LSD and birth control to take a trip without the kids." And to the silent room he added, "I have more lines than the telephone company."
Attention back to her, "Come, we shall construct statues with the clouds from our passion. Neither time nor I be tight-lipped. We will tell. Let the rubber band in your mind relax and unwind. Board with me our tumbling train."
She took his outstretched hand and they left together. Those in the audience wondered if this was all part of the act. Were they getting what they had paid for? But could hear the deep and now soothing voice of Captain Rhetoric in the distance and strained to capture every word.
"Early in the century of our moment together. Remember, my dear? Your moist writing, still warm on your cheeks, has spoken. You should know, my sweetest of peas, unlike M & Ms, I melt everywhere . . . "
YOU ARE READING
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