Love or lust? || 365 days

~24~

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A song for this chapter: 365 days by: Marissa ft. EMO
***

(Cordelia's POV)

I pulled Massimo into a random room to talk. There weren't many decorations in the room, just a few black leather armchairs, a small round wooden table and a few tall empty bookshelves.

Massimo opened his mouth to talk but I stopped him before he could.

"I have been putting up with this for almost a year. But now I've finally realized that we need to have a talk. For real this time. No excuses."

Massimo sat calmly on one of the black leather armchairs and looked up at me.

"I don't even know why and how I have the patience to still continue this game." I started.

"What do you mean bella?"

"Smettila." I spoke calmly but sternly. "Now you have only one job, Massimo. I want you to listen to me quietly."

He didn't say anything but just nodded slowly.

"We have continued this for a long time. We have been doing this long before Laura. But when she came you became even harder to read. I have no fucking idea what you want. You know what I want. So now I want you to answer one simple question which will change things forever."

Massimo nodded telling me to continue.

I looked in his deep dark eyes. Impossible to read. If things were to go south I wanted to have one last look at his beautiful eyes. Then I finally asked.

"Do you love me or is it just lust?" I was not sure if I wanted to hear his answer after all.

"Of course I love you 'Lia. I have-"

"No you don't understand. Do you love me, love me?" Tears started to slowly fill my eyes. "Or do you love Laura? You can't have both."

"'Lia. Don't."

"WHO DO YOU WANT MASSIMO?!" I screamed. Tears were now running down my cheeks. I finally broke after all this time. "This is the moment where you choose! The moment when you come clean. Have you ever loved me like you love her?"

"I want Laura." Massimo answered after a small silence.

I didn't say or do anything. Just looked at the man in front of me. The man I had loved since I was fifteen. The man who had sworn to keep me safe and not to let anything or anyone hurt me. I had blindly loved him.

That man had a gun in his hand all the time, pointing at my heart. All these years I trusted him not to pull the trigger and hurt my heart. But he just broke his promise... and pulled the trigger.

"Leave." I whispered.

Massimo didn't stand up instantly. He sat on the chair quietly looking at me.

Neither of us moved for a minute before he finally stood up and slowly walked past me to the door and opened it.

I heard him stop before walking out. But soon he left, closing the door behind him.

I was left there standing alone in the middle of a dark room. Hot tears slowly running down my cheeks smudging my mascara. I felt empty. I felt nothing.

I slowly turned around and walked out of the room and back to mine. I sat on my bed and took my black heels off.

I don't even know why I tried. It's obvious that he would never love me like I love him. Sometimes I just hoped that he would. But then again I should have guessed when he brought home the picture of Laura.

I wiped my eyes, smudging my mascara even more in the process. I cleared my throat slightly and dialed a number on my phone.

~

That's when I decided. 'I'm not going to try. He can have her although she doesn't want him. I deserve to be happy too.'

I'm going to start living that single life like I should have done long ago. And I'm going to stick with this decision.

And when Laura makes it crystal clear to him that she doesn't want him I'm not going to be here anymore waiting for him.

I need to get out of here...