LUCYS COUSIN - a julien baker fanfic

chapter five - confession

november 19th 2022

(juliens pov)

i heard laughing which made me wake up, i checked my phone and it was noon. i walked out of my room rubbing my eyes, i saw everyone sitting on the couch. they all laughed, im assuming it's because my hair is usually super messy when i wake up. i walked over to ivy sleepily and laid my head on her shoulder, sort of wrapping my arms around her. i guess i didn't really realize what i was doing because i heard phoebe mumble "get a room" and lucy giggle. i would have gotten defensive, but ivy giggled as well so i guess she was okay with it.

"okay julien i'm getting you out of the house we're going to get dunkin, ivy will you stay here with pheebs? also everyone text me their orders, i'll make a groupchat" lucy said. "yea i'll stay here with phoebe" ivy smiled. i groaned and sat up, "lucy i love you but i will never not be mad about you dragging me out of the house right after i wake up. this happens so often" i said, my voice coming out much more groggily than i anticipated. i heard ivy giggle, "does it really?" she asked. "yes." me and phoebe said at the same time.

me and lucy went in the car and i saw a notification pop up on my phone that read,

geniuses + ivy

mother (lucy)

phobia (phoebe)

little genius (julien)

poison (ivy) (haha get it)

geniuses + ivy
mother
what do you guys want? besides julien
i know what you want

poison
just get me whatever julien gets, i don't
really drink coffee so i'll just try whatever
she gets

phobia
just a bagel please, love u luce

mother
love you too pheebs

i decided it was probably a good idea to tell lucy about how i feel about ivy.

"jesus fuck lucy i really have to tell you something" i said, sounding much more stressed than i wanted to. "calm down, what do you wanna tell me" she said turning the radio down a little. i sat there for a minute, bouncing my leg and wondering what to say. "uhm i think.. that maybe i like ivy or something" i saw her eyebrows raise, which made me anxious. "sorry forget i said anything i-" i started, "no no it's okay, i didn't expect it from you, i sort of expected it from her even though she is denying it. i know she just got kicked out and everything but this is the happiest she's looked with someone, in a while" lucy replied. i did kind of realize this, with her last partner, rachel, she didn't really look happy in the relationship, or even in the friendship when they were just friends. but then again i've known her for a while so wouldn't it fuck everything up? "julien i know she won't admit it because she is scared of accepting it herself, but that girl loves you. i can see it in her eyes, i can see it when you guys look at eachother, when you look at her it almost looks like you found your safe person. i want you two to be happy, with eachother, so please when you find a time tell her. because i know once you say something, she won't be scared to accept herself" lucy said, making me tear up.

"i think you're right" i say, making her nod and smile. "everything will work out, you big goof" she said kissing my forehead, making me giggle.

we pulled in the driveway with three coffees, a tea, and a bagel. we walked through the front door to see phoebe and ivy on the couch, just like they were before. lucy sat down beside phoebe. i brought phoebe her bagel and tea, "we got you tea just incase" i smiled, ruffling her hair. then i turned to ivy and handed her coffee, "i'm kinda scared to try this" she giggled. "it's really good, do you wanna try mine first so you'll know if you want your whole drink?" i asked, "yea sure" she smiled. she took a sip of mine and immediately ran to the sink, "EWW, NOPE. JULIEN YOU CAN HAVE MY COFFEE" she screamed washing her mouth out with water, making us all laugh. "oh cmon it's not that bad, you're being dramatic" i said, still resisting the urge to cackle. "it is bad, thank you very much" she said smiling and sitting back down beside me.

she stood up after a few minutes, "okay guys i'm gonna go take a shower, just bang on the door if my music is too loud or annoying" she said.
after a few minutes i heard music come from the bathroom, i heard ivy start singing and me and the two others on the couch all looked at eachother in amazement. "holy fuck i just fell head over heels" i said making lucy and phoebe giggle. the song ended and salt in the wound by boygenius started playing, "SHIT SONG!!" phoebe screamed, making us laugh, and hear ivy cackle loudly from the bathroom in return.

after a while her music stopped. i felt my phone buzzed in my hand and looked down, it read ivys text

                                      Ivy🌿

Ivy 🌿
hey i accidentally grabbed one
of your shirts, i was wondering if
you want to get me a different one?
or is this fine? it's a black carhartt
                            
                                                                                                                      Julien
                                                                                  No that's okay you can wear it!!                I have like a thousand of those,                                  but even if it wasn't that certain shirt i   wouldn't mind, don't worry :)
read

i was scrolling on my phone until the sound of the bathroom door opening made my head snap upwards, she walked out, her hair wet, in my shirt and some oversized sweatpants. now this doesn't sound like a big deal, but she looked ethereal to me, in that moment. she walked back in our room to put her speaker back, i watched the door waiting to see if she would come back after a few minutes, but she never did.

i stood up from the couch, "i'm gonna go smoke one" i said to phoebe and lucy, them nodding in response. i grabbed a cigarette and a lighter from my pocket, and walked outside. i heard ivy ask lucy where i went and then lucy telling her. i saw her slide the door open and walk out, sitting down beside me.

we sat in silence for a moment before she spoke, "you know that's gonna ruin your pretty voice right" she said pointed at my cigarette, which was now being smushed in an ashtray as i puffed out the last bit of smoke. i shrugged, "it's also gonna ruin that pretty skin of yours, it's not very healthy, j" i swear i choked then, and it wasn't because of the smoke. "yeah i know, i've been trying to quit. i've actually been doing really good about it lately, it's a thursday and that's the only one i've smoked all week." i said turning to her. "we'll im proud of you" she nodded smiling.

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a/n: hi! i've been plotting..... anyways. i love gay people so i wrote two chapters today while my girlfriend works, i miss her :(     (she has been gone for an hour) i have the flu rn so i feel like i'm dying but i'm slowly making it thru, my girlfriend has been making me plenty of soup and giving me cough medicine (yuck) so i should get better soon, but besides that i hope you enjoy :)
-E

1274 words