Big Sky Dreams

Burke - Chapter 8

Underneath the love that Vivian obviously felt for her kids, there was so much pain.  Burke could see how Elenore covered up her pain by endless chatter and a bright smile, but it was there in the shadows of her eyes if you knew how to look.  Matt had withdrawn into himself, barely speaking to anyone, a tactic that Burke was familiar with.  One his therapist relentlessly talked to him about.  And then there was Vivian.  She had embraced the cold stoicism favored by the northern Europeans, all arrogance and pride.  Stone walls to protect their vulnerable interiors.  

As soon as the mask had slammed down on her face after the emotional conversation with her daughter, a conversation that he had listened to intently even though his gaze had never wavered from the boy in front of him, he understood and cherished even more the gift that Matt had given him.  He hadn't missed the astonishment on both Vivian and Elenores faces when Matt came up to sit next to him, and he vowed right then and there to himself to never do anything to damage the trust this hurting little boy was giving him.

Meeting Vivians eyes over the head of her daughter, he nodded slightly to himself as the vow he had just made extended to the two ladies in the room as well.  A fierce need to protect this fragile family etched itself into his soul as he sat there.  Even if nothing happened with the gorgeous woman that he couldn't deny his attraction to, he would watch over them to the best of his ability.

With the turning of the mood and Matt's retelling of his favorite book winding down, Burke ruffled the little boys long hair and smiled down at him.  "Thank you for sharing.  I will have to read this book so we can discuss it further."  The bright smile he was rewarded with further cemented his need to protect them, to shield this little boy who clearly felt very deeply, from any more pain.

Vivian, seeing that he was preparing to stand, kissed Ellie on the head and asked her and Matt to take Pax out to do his business.  The little girl unwound herself from around her mother as Matt joined her.  Pax followed obediently along behind them as they headed towards the mudroom off the kitchen.  Grabbing the tray before Vivian could, Burke carried it into the kitchen, ignoring the womans protests.  Turning to her, he gently grabbed her shoulders, not missing how her breath hitched and her eyes widened.

"I like to help, let me help."  Momentarily stunned, she didn't move as Burke began to rinse out the ice cream bowls and place them in the dishwasher.  It was both amusing and concerning to him that she didn't know how to react to him doing these few dishes for her.  He could see her brow furrowing and her fists clenching as she processed the turn of events.

Finally, she sighed, her shoulders dropping.  "Well, at least let me send you home with some of those cookies.  And maybe some of the leftover stew and the rest of the bread." Grinning, he nodded, accepting her generous offer for what it was.  He could cook, but there was something about good food made by another person that made everything taste so much better.  And he had to admit that the bread, while simple and rustic, was phenomenal paired with the stew.  When he said as much to her, he chuckled as her cheeks went pink.

The kids came back in just as she was finishing packing up his leftovers, and after instructing them to thank Burke for the puppy, sent them on their way to get ready for bed.  Smiling, Vivian handed him the bag of food and then led the way to the front door.  He was pleasantly surprised when she stepped out onto the front porch behind him and closed the door.  They were illuminated by the light through the windows and the brisk night air was cool and refreshing against his heated skin.  She looked up at him, her gray eyes pale in the dim light as he memorized the shape of her nose, her cheeks, her lips.  Heat crackled between them, zapping against his skin as he held himself back from kissing her senseless against her front door, from burying his fingers into her hair and pulling her tightly against him, soft curves against his hardness.  He wanted her with the desperation of a starved man presented with a feast.  He ached with the need to bury himself in her, to feel her beneath him, writhing and full around his cock as he worshiped her.

Fighting himself for control, he almost lost it again when Vivian stuck her hand out to shake his.  He almost pulled her against him but managed to politely shake her hand instead, although he couldn't help himself when he brought her wrist up to kiss it lightly, inhaling her scent before gently letting her hand go.  Winking at her, he smirked as the heat in her eyes let him know that she was not immune to his charms, despite any reluctance she might be feeling.

"Good night, Vivian." He said, tilting his nonexistent hat.  "It was lovely to meet you and your family.  I am so glad that Pax is going to work out.  Let me know if there is anything else that I can do for you."  Turning, even though his instincts screamed that he should be doing the exact opposite, he left.

***

The dreams rode him hard that night.  He awoke with a roar, covered in sweat, the smell of burning rubber and blood in his nostrils, tears running down his face and getting lost in the scruff along his jaw.  Scrubbing his face with his hands, Burke slowly lay down again, the soft apology that passed his lips loud in the empty room as his chest heaved.  

He prayed for oblivion.  

It never came.