THE HEART WANTS WHAT IT WANTS

12.PAIN

AMARA
5days
It's been five days of taking care of Zoey and Lilith. I love them so much and I wouldn't hesitate to help them. but right now, I just want to sleep

I walk into my house and the smell of alcohol envelopes my nose
my so called parents are arguing again. I decide to just ignore them and run upstairs slaming my door shut

"Home sweet home" I say to myself and throw myself on my bed

I block out the outside noise as best as I can and try to get some sleep

Until BANG! I hear something drop and my head snaps up
I hear a bottle break and I run downstairs

I find the man I call dad holding my mum by her neck strangling her. I run to them and push him away and my mum drops to the ground
I rush to her and check if she's okay

That stupid man gets up grabs me by my hair and throws me against the wall the pain rushes through my back but I refuse to show him I'm in any pain

"You foolish girl didn't anyone teach you respect" He comes closer and grabs my chain making me look at him
"You shouldn't interfere when big people are talking"

I spit in his face and he slaps me with the back of his hand but I show him no reaction

Instead I walk away from him and help my mum up we go up stairs and get cleaned up

He hit me. I always knew he would one day and the waiting was killing me
it scared me each day wondering when he will strike. I was like a dear waiting for the lion to make its move but now that its here, I feel nothing

My cheek stings and my back aches but I don't care I need to stay strong for my mum

I put her to sleep on my bed and I sleep on my desk table just so she's comfortable enough
The next morning I don't find her anywhere in the house but I know she'll be back

I get ready for work feeling extremely exhausted, I'm practically just dragging my feet at this point

"You're late" Abby says as I walk to the back
"I know, I'm sorry" she hugs me and smiles at me
"It's okay you don't have to apologise" and she walks off

"Are you okay" lili comes over giving me a tight hug I make no sound no longer feeling the pain as much thanks to some pain killers
"I'm fine" I smile and get to work

~~~~~

You see, the thing about pain is, it won't last forever but it slowly kills you. getting a piece of you everyday until there is nothing left.

The more you ignore it the more you lose pieces of you.
You dig a deep hole for it like a Black hole in space and throw the pain in it, hoping it will disappear but it never actually leaves
It hunts you each day until you can't take it anymore and let it eat you up, atleast what's left of you
And no one will ever know your pain until it kills you.

Michael my so called dad didn't stop with just one slap
Everytime I opened my mouth to defend my mum he hit

"You are a stupid sad man who would rather spend his money on worthless sluts than your own wife"
I feel a sharp pain in my ribs has he kicks me hard
I laugh out loud and that angers him more

I try to get up but he sends a punch to my cheek causing me to fall back
Well might has well just lay here

"You're the worthless slut not them"
"Oh so you admit you have sluts interesting" I burst out laughing even though my ribs hurt

He grabs my hair pulling me up and lands a hard punch on my stomach must have hit a nerve

my mum steps in holding him back but he punches her in the gut and she falls to the ground