𝙵𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 \\\ lilpeep FF SEQUEL

"f*ck"

Jan 21st 2018 Sunday
- New Orleans

(video this is inspired by)

I looked passed the wall that blocked the crowds view of anyone backstage. there's so many people. my biggest crowd I've performed for yet.

it's been so long since I've encountered fans and performed. my nerves began acting up as I got anxiety from thinking about how everyone will react to me. they don't know I'm joining marshmello. it's a surprise performance.

I just hope I don't get booed.

I chugged the last bit of water I had in this water bottle. I took a couple shots, beforehand as well to try and ease any nerves. unfortunately that shit didn't calm me down as much I thought it would. all I can think about is fucking up or being boo'ed.
-

"How y'all feelin tonight?!.." ( Marshmello )

my heart dropped a bit.
his speech is my signal to get ready to be on.

I quickly rushed to the nearest garbage as everything I ate from hours before started to shoot from my mouth. "augh." I groaned low, then spit out the last bit of puke from my mouth.

"Hey you're on in- .. ar-are you okay?.." One of the girls in Marshmellos team said, a look of concern on her face. I turned to her and nodded with a small smile. "Here." she continued, handing me a water bottle.

"but anyway..you're on now." I nodded and took the water. she smiled slightly as she gently patted my arm before walking away seconds later.

~ I gotta go out now.. fuuuuuck... Im not ready ~

quickly chugging and swallowing the water. I set it down and immediately picked up the mic assigned to me.

~ I'm not ready... what if they hate me still.. fuck.. I wish I wasn't alone here~

the crowd went wild as the intro to the song began to play.

Mellos words that I've been drowning out hit like a brick when I finally came to and heard him yell "LIL PEEP." the crowds volume became louder then before.

"okokok." I whispered, spewing out my words rapidly.

I took my last deep breath.

then ran on to the stage.

- GIA -

( 2 weeks later)
~ what happened over the two weeks ~

(after he left -)
after Gus got picked up by one of Mellos drivers, to escort him to the tour bus.

I've literally been going insane.

not really.