Changes

Chapter Twenty Nine - The Ballad of John and Yoko

     I followed the muffling, leading me to the living room. When I walked in, the sound suddenly became clear as I saw John, holding a tissue to his face, crying into his hands. What could have happened in the past 5 days when I was gone? I couldn't help but wonder.

     "John?" I accidentally startled him, he jumped when he saw me and started to cough aggressively.

     "You're home!" His voice cracked.

     "What's wrong?" I sat by his side and brought him into my arms, but he abruptly let himself out. This wasn't like him. He would never leave if I were to give him a hug like this.

     "I think ..." He started to say what was on his mind, but was clearly struggling.

     "You think? ..." I tried to help him out, trying to not sound impatient. He cleared his throat again before speaking.

     "I think we need a divorce." He said, rapidly. He let out a sigh of relief, like a giant weight was lifted off his chest and he could finally catch his very needed breath. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I came back so I could make things right and be there for him like our vows had promised, but now he wants to end it all? Just, give up all that we built together? We were destined for each other. Soulmates. Twin flames. However you want to put it. We had this deep connection of love that expanded in different ways from partners, best friends, each other's half. At that moment, my whole world felt like it was crashing down on me. Everything I fought for, went to waste. For nothing. For no one. Nothing I had done in my life was no longer worth anything. The happy memories of John and I now became sad and distant. I didn't know what to say, and instead I cried from the overwhelming emotions that exploded like a volcano. While I cried, John just sat there, staring at me and crying with me. We cried with each other for what felt like a lifetime before one of us spoke again, "God, you know I love you so much but this; you and me ... it doesn't feel right anymore. It doesn't feel like natural love anymore. We need to go our own way." I took an extra minute to calmly breath before replying.

     "Why are you thinking this?"

     "I know you feel it too. If you didn't, you would have been in disbelief and asked me that question right away, so I don't think I need to explain myself." Was he right?

     "Are you kidding me, John? Stop sounding like a theorist and answer the damn question!"

     "The spark is gone, Y/N. It has been for so long. Ever since ..." He had a hard time getting the rest of his phrase out, but I knew what he was thinking.

     "You found out my secret." I finished the sentence for him, and he nodded silently. "I thought we had moved past that and you accepted me?"

     "I do, but that doesn't change the fact that it's been so hard to live my everyday life now. I feel like I'm having to accommodate every move I make and every word I say just so I don't hurt you or threaten your abilities in any way."

     "Well, you're certainly doing a great job at it now!" I yelled, my anger building up. He was starting to as well. His face was turning red and his hands were slightly shaking.

     "Damn you should've told me this when we met and maybe we'd be living a happily ever after lifestyle!"

     "We were living like that, John! We both loved each other and whatever else happened didn't matter because we had each other, our love, our history."

     "It never truly felt like that, though! Don't you understand that you made me, and everyone else in the world live a fucking lie just to entertain yourself?"

     "YES, OF COURSE I UNDERSTAND THAT BUT THE POINT IS THAT YOU STILL LOVED ME, AND I LOVED YOU, SO WE COULD PUSH THROUGH THIS TOGETHER!"

     "WE MAY HAVE BEEN TOGETHER PHYSICALLY, BUT WE NEVER WERE EMOTIONALLY!" We both yelled, trying to get each other to understand where we were coming from but it didn't seem to work. John sighed, and started to speak again more calmly. "I felt that emotional and physical connection with someone else while you were away, and they made me realize how much of life I've missed out because of our relationship together. This doesn't change how much I love you, though, Y/N. I do, but not the same way as I used to. It breaks my heart to admit it but I realized that I have to put myself first. I'm sorry."

     My mother was right. The stuff that happened in the other world happened here too. He fell in love with Yoko Ono.

     "It's her, isn't it. Yoko Ono."

     "Yes. She's just, so incredible and -"

     "I don't want to hear it, John. I know how you feel about each other and I'm happy that you found someone who can provide that emotional support for you again. I'm sorry that I failed you. I'll go pack my things." I started to walk away, but then John grabbed my arm lightly.

     "You don't need to pack your things, Y/N. Yoko's going to help me move out in a week from tomorrow, and I've already found an apartment to live in."

     "In that case, I'll go back home and return in a week from tomorrow when you've moved out. Then we can settle our divorce." We both nodded, saying goodbye and I left the opened the locket. We watched the big green portal open in front of us, and I was about to take a step in before I felt the familiar grip on my arm again. I locked my eyes with John, tears starting to form again.

     "Goodbye, Y/N." John muttered.

     "See you soon." I said, light heartedly.

     Unexpectedly, John pulled me into a sentimental goobye kiss, full of a different kind of passion. One we both weren't familiar with. And then I left, back to my original home.