Crazy In Love | Buggy

f o r t y - f i v e

Time seemed to freeze in that horrible moment. All I could hear was the sound of my own heartbeat in my ears, and my laboured breathing. I couldn't move. My mind was screaming for me to do something but I was motionless.

Part of me expected to see thrashing, or at least some movement in the water, but it was completely still. It was as if he was never there.

I remembered him telling me that the price he paid for his devil fruit powers were that he lost his ability to swim. He couldn't save himself. If left alone, he'd certainly drown.

The thought of this sent my body suddenly jumped into action. It was as if I had been injected with all the adrenaline in the world.

I didn't even think about my own safety, I just gliding towards the big whole in the ice that he had left. When I peered down into the abyss, I couldn't even see him. It was deep, it was dark.

Saving him seemed like an impossible task but I didn't care. I ripped off both of my ice skating boots, worried the weight of them would just weigh me down.

Then, I dove into the water. I knew it would be cold but I could never have imagined how utterly paralysing it would be. I was used to swimming in warm water, so this was a completely new world for me.

In this water, my limbs became stiff almost immediately. I had to fight for every movement that I made. It was dark too, I couldn't see a thing, not even my own arms in front of my face.

I desperately wanted Buggy to thrash or kick, let me know where the hell he was. Without any signal, I had no clue for where to swim to find him. Apart from me, the water was still, unmoving. Finding him was like looking for a needle in a haystack.

The one thought that my mind was screaming was he's going to die. It was horrible. The idea of him drowning in this icy hellish nightmare was unimaginable.

Was he still conscious? I wondered. Part if me hoped that he had hit his head, knocked himself out so at least he wouldn't die in terror.

No! He's not dead. He isn't allowed to die. I'll find him and I'll save him. I was determined.

A life without him didn't even seem worth living. All I wanted in that moment was to be back in bed with him, like I had been this morning. Wrapped tightly in his warm arms, protected and safe.

That might have been the last time I'll ever sleep in the same bed as him, I realised. I shouldn't have allowed us to get up. I should have insisted we stayed there. Screw ice skating. This would never have happened if we just stayed there forever.

Suddenly, I felt something solid against my hand. Was it the ground or was it him? I grabbed, feeling fabric.

My heart did about a thousand somersaults in my chest. My oxygen was running low now but I didn't care. I'd happily drown to save him.

I got the best grip I could, both hands tightly woven into the fabric of his gloves, as I began to try and swim up. He was heavy, but I was still full of adrenaline.

It felt like a lifetime I was swimming upstairs, pulling Buggy with me with all my might, when I finally broke free from the water. I gasped for air but didn't waste any time.

Luckily, he had fallen through not too far from the ground. I heaved his body up so that he could breath, which caused me to sink underneath the water.

I let go of him with one hand and used it to break the ice, clear a path to the solid ground. It felt like that took longer than the rescue, but when I was done I was able to put Buggy's body on dry land.

Once he was on, I almost allowed myself to fall back under the water. I was utterly exhausted. I couldn't allow myself to drown, though. Buggy would be long dead before anyone came looking for us.

I crawled onto dry land, allowing myself to collapse against the ground for a moment. The cold was now unbearable.

My clothes were soaked, the icy air and snowy ground were making the water turn to ice. I was colder than I had ever been in my entire life.

Imagine how cold Buggy is, I thought to myself. That was my motivator to keep moving.

I sat up, inspecting Buggy. He looked dead. My heart felt like it was breaking into a million small pieces, tears began to stream from my eyes, down my cheeks. It was so cold that they were actually freezing, too.

"Bug?" I whispered, trying to feel for a pulse. "I'm so sorry. I was so slow... I should have... I-I... this is all my fault."

I broke down, hysterically sobbing against his soaking wet jacket. I only allowed myself to do this for a moment.

"I've wasted enough time. I need to get you to town as soon as possible. Just hold on, okay? Can you hear me?"

He was silent. Or dead. I wasn't quite sure which one.

I stood up, feeling the snow against my bare socks as I walked. I grabbed onto his jacket and began to pull him towards town.

It had been a five minute walk. How long would it take to physically drag him there? Too long.

Part of me considered leaving him, running to find clowns to help me. I was too scared to leave him. What if wolves got him? What if I couldn't find him again? What if he died, all alone, while I was gone?

No. Leaving him wasn't an option.

It felt like forever that I dragged him through the woods. Had I gone the wrong way? With the snow coming down so heavy, our tracks had been erased. It was hard to remember where we had been.

Just as I began to really worry that I had gone the wrong way, I saw houses in the distance.

"We're almost there," I told him, as if he could actually hear me. "Just hold on a little longer. It's only a little longer."

I could hear the noise of the town. That meant they'd be able to hear me, too.

So I began to scream for help, as loud as I could. My throat burned and ached from almost drowning myself but I pushed through it.

I heard the sound of people running towards us. "Thank God."

The first clown I saw was a red and orange one, tall, maybe six foot tall. That was good, he could help me pull Buggy towards town.

"What on Earth happened?"

"We were on the ice and... he fell through. I tried to get him out as quickly as I could but..."

"Is he alive?"

That question was like a punch to the stomach. I almost collapsed at the sound of it. He had to be. I couldn't bear the thought that he was gone.

"I-I don't know. Please, just help me. Our cabin had the fire on. It'll be warm. Help me bring him there."

More clowns began to appear. They all looked horrified at the sight, some of them even looked angry at me. Did they think this was my fault?

Without saying anything, the red and orange clown lifted Buggy up effortlessly, as if he weighed nothing, flinging him over his shoulders.

I wanted to tell him to be careful with him, but if these clowns already hated me, I didn't want to anger them more.

So, I just followed them towards our cabin in silence.