The sickness called love(Soukoku)

A start to a new beginning

Tw:Suicide Father and son Dazai and Atsushi relationship

Atsushi

"Ding dong"

I stood be Dazai's door waiting as I held a bag of ramen I ordered to go Dazai has been acting weird and keeps mentioning someone in his sleep and something about them leaving him and to be honest he hasn't been sleeping I can tell instead of him being enthusiastic as normal he just seems more sleep deprived so I figured ordering him something would help

I waited some more looking through a window which was at the front of his flat it was dark and felt off and empty I rung the door bell another time

"Ding dong"

Still nothing

Nothing but silence

I sighed knocking on the door about to give up until the door opened with a few taps I stood ready the air heavy and uneasy as I walked in knowing it was always unsafe to do this act especially in scary movies where they always end up dead

"Dazai-San?"

I walked in quietly until I heard a choked gasp and the sound of struggling

I turned my head to see Dazai in his night wear sitting in the corner while he had a tv cable around his neck as he struggled grabbing at it his finger tips bleeding as he gasped for air

I heard a shocked gasp escape my mouth letting the bag of noodles slip out of my grip rushing to his side quickly trying to untangle the cable eventually giving up seeing he seemed to be going unconscious using my ability careful not to touch him as he tried to use his hand to push me but fortunately I already cut the cable as he touch my arm weakly trying to push be back

He gasped heaving as air finally came through his lungs my vision blurred for the tears which rushed out my eyes I just fell into him hugging him immediately sobbing as I felt a arm go around me weakly I flinched moving back "why..."  I sobbed he just shook his head seeming ashamed of failing

"W-we have to get Yosano! Someone to help you!" I said panicking not noticing I dropped my phone running to him

"No"

He shook his head at me "huh?" I said my voice cracking "b-but we have to you almost died Dazai-San please-!"

"No..." He grunted getting up as I stayed below him not wanting to move trying to stop the tears which still rushed out my eyes

"Don't tell anyone about this Atsushi..."

His voice was scratchy and dull as I just nodded too scared to deny him or to talk as a note sat beside me with a few words:

"I'm sorry my love"

I crumbled it up not angry at him but angry at myself for not helping before this happened I did not want to lose him not him too he's the only good father figure I've had and the only alive one as well

Dazai simply walked away as if nothing ever happened as I sat there balling my eyes out and all he did is offer me mint milk-tea in which I did not want from a lost of appetite