Finding Yourself: Book Three

Chapter Sixteen: Done (Feat. Coffee)

(TW: verbal fighting, panic attack)

After all the conversation, all the members of the gathering sat for a nice meal. Each business owner took turns during the meal to stand at a podium in front of the tables and describe their business to the audience. Nick tuned Xavier's speech out and opted to sip the glass of champagne that he was offered. 

Soon, Elian had to leave to do his speech, so Nick was left at the table alone. There were others sitting at the table with them, but Nick didn't know them well. He wanted to support Elian, but he could feel eyes on him. He knew that Xavier was glaring at him from a couple tables away; however, those weren't the only eyes he caught looking at him. He started getting self-conscious; maybe some people recognized him from when he was with Xavier? Maybe they knew Xavier well. Yet, Nick didn't recognize anybody from events that he had previously attended. Feeling a little awkward, he decided to go to the restroom to distract himself.

It took a couple tries to find the restrooms, but he asked an employee of the building to get directions on where to go. The bathroom was very pristine, with modern linoleum black flooring and walls. The sinks had a black and gold swirled granite pattern with shiny golden, motion-sensed sink nozzles. The urinals all had their own private stall.

Nick walked over to the sinks, debating if he should wash his makeup off with water. He started to feel the substance crawling over his face. It was probably just his nerves getting to him. 

And then, the bathroom door opened, which Nick didn't think much of at first. Then, he heard Xavier speak.

"You know, I didn't expect you to be here," Xavier started off, "Especially not with him." Nick didn't have anything to say about that, and he was kind of frozen in the moment. A small part of Nick's mind was panicking about being alone with Xavier, and another part of his mind told him that he could hold his own. He turned to face Xavier defiantly.

"Listen, I know I can't take the kids from you, Nick," Xavier admitted, but still sounding smug somehow. "I know that I have given you the ability to put me in jail. It's my fault really, for hurting you. But honestly, I think you deserve it. You are such a wh*re." Xavier's icy clue eyes bore into Nick's eyes, and then Nick thought of Elian's pretty ocean blue eyes. He wished Elian was here.

"No. I'm not," Nick protested. He wanted to be strong, but he didn't feel himself. Not in this suit. Not in this place.

"Oh please," Xavier sneered, "It's been what? A month or so, since our divorce? And already, you've saddled up to another rich guy as if you're his b**ch. You look at him as if you are in love. And with Elian specifically? God, I wish I read the signs when we were married."

Nick could feel his cheeks heat up with anger. Sure, to Xavier, it really did look like he moved on too fast. Maybe his heart did move on too fast, but it was all Xavier's d**n fault. Xavier could have had Nick has his husband forever, and he threw it all away. 

Nick was glad the bathroom was empty because he didn't think before lashing out.

"I never cheated on you Xavier!" Nick protested angrily, throwing his hands up in the air, "I would never throw away our marriage, just like that!"

"Then why did you divorce me?" Xavier growled back, "If you loved me so much, then why did you leave me?" Nick had enough of Xavier's bulls**t. He got up in Xavier's face and pushed his hands into his chest forcefully.

"Because you left me!" Nick yelled in his face, pushing his chest again. "I was left by myself every night so that you could hook up with that- that guy, whatever his name was. And you never gave a s**t about me. I cooked your food every night. I washed your laundry and made your bed. I cried while you were gone for the longest time, hoping you would come back home soon. And you dare-" Nick pushed him back again. "You dare call me a wh*re, when you f**ked more people than I ever had. You dare guilt me for leaving you when you gave me no choice. You f**king dare and try to take my children."