TW: unreality, gaslighting, self harm, suicide, mental health stigma, reputation (numbers & phrases), ableism, death, dissociation, (past) suicide baiting,
Up and down
Down down down down
These numbers mean nothing
Rage and pain
If it means nothing
Leaving me to die alone
Your eyes sharp like a knife
Cutting up my skin
I cry
All night
They point fingers at the fallen
But praise those brave enough to take out the pain on themselves
I don't get that privilege anymore
I'm irredeemable
I'm irredeemable
Don't save me
I have DEPD
Degenerate Personality Disorder
Loose ends tied up
Crying over your dead body
"It never happened."
"It wasn't that bad."
"It didn't hurt that bad."
"Your okay."
Okay
Okay
Okay
Okay
Liar
You. Lied
They all did, stabbing my back
Step by step by step
Following me every step of the way
Walking into a meat grinder
Reduced to painstakingly high temperature
Sharp grinding needles in the back of my head
123
1234
43217654
Numbers
Everything so disgusting
Dissociating Away
I don't know what day it is
I don't recognize it's body
I don't remember these walls
I don't remember you
I don't hear anything
The colors are a bit odd
Metal in my legs
I don't know where I am
I don't know what I can see
I don't know the shadows
I don't know
Everything is so distant
But not far enough to ease the pain
Your so toxic
Blaming me for everything
Calling me a retarded piece of shit
Making me cry
"Go kill yourself"
Do you not hear your own voice?
What if I do?
I know you wouldn't care.
Maybe I will.
Maybe I can
I want to die
I hate my life, I hate everything
I want to burn
I'm tired
I'm so sleepy
Leave me alone
I'm going to be in bed
I don't leave my bed
I don't need to brush my teeth
I didn't know who you are
You are my drug
I miss everything
I miss everyone
I have to many triggers
I'm to traumatized for my own good
So many Times
Just humble me already
I want to hug you
I want to stab you
I hate my own writings
I hate my own my own life
I love myself sometimes
I don't know why
I want to feel okay
Degenerate Personality Disorder
A extremely rare disorder only effecting 2 people
Symptoms include:
- Fear
- Anxiety
- Mistrust
- Lying
- Stealing
- Faking a British accent
- Drawing nasty art
- Experiencing A Disorder the wrong way
DEPD is officially the worst disorder
YOU ARE READING
Vent art, poetry, and just... vent
PoetryTW, it gets dark. If you have a passion for bizarre stuff and shitty poetry and mental illness then this book is...... concerningly accurate to your unhealthy interests. I'm okay, don't worry 👍😘
