The Secret (Book 2 in The Deception Series)

Chapter 22: off and on

Jules
~~~~~

"Missed Calls"- Mac Miller

I sit in the living room with Jake, Lily, Garrett, and Taylor. They were all chatting up, and I tried to chime in on the conversation every once in a while, but I couldn't focus on anything.

These last few days have been off, Brennen has been acting extremely distant with me. He didn't talk to me as much and when I'd try to talk to him, he couldn't even look at me. He even stopped coming into my room at nights to hookup. But that was the least of my worries. I knew our whole hookup thing would come to an end eventually, but I figured he'd at least talk to me before just ending it. On top of that, I still had Taylor's journal that was taunting me every day. It was killing me. I needed to sneak it back into her bag without her knowin,g but I didn't know how.

Everytime she was over, she'd be in Garrett's room or she'd be down here with her bag next to her. And the times she left her bag in his room, it felt wrong for me to go inside the room to put it back. That was Garrett's space and I couldn't just invade it, even if I was technically living here now.

I would try to put it in her bag at work but she's been putting it in the lockers that we have for the staff. So I was kind of stuck with teh damn thing. I haven't read anything. I wanted to but I felt like shit even thinking about doing it.

"You okay over there?" I hear a voice ask.

I snap back to reality and see Garrett frowning at me, "Oh, yeah. Sorry, I just zoned out." I force a smile onto my face.

He nods as he rests in his seat next to Taylor with his arm resting over her shoulder. I looked at Taylor who seemed zoned out as well. She's kind of been like that all week, she wasn't as talkative and chatty as usual. She also hasn't been around much, today was one of the rare days she was. I asked Garrett the other day about where she was and he said that she's been busy with some study group she was in.

The front door opens and I watch Chris and Brennen walk in. My heart skips a beat when I see Brennen like it always does.

"Hey, guys." Chris smiles when he sees all of us.

The guys greet him and I just smile before I look at Brennen who was looking at Taylor. But it wasn't his usual look, it seemed more of an anxious look. I looked at Taylor who wasn't even looking at him and was staring down at her lap. Was I missing something?

Chris walks over to me and sits down before grabbing the TV remote and turning the TV on.

Brennen doesn't say anything before he turns around and makes his way upstairs, dragging his leg that was wrapped in a big boot up with him.

"Is he okay?" Jake asks the room as he watches his friend leave.

"He's been acting weird all week." Lily voices.

"Dude, yeah. We went out to get food today and I was playing sad Taylor Swift songs and he didn't even complain." Chris explains.

I frown. Was he falling back into his dark hole again?

"He's barely even talking to me. I'm starting to think he's just avoiding me all together." Garrett explains.

I looked next at his girlfriend who hadn't said a word and was still staring down at her lap. Okay, I can't be crazy. There was something going on.

"I'll go talk to him." I say as I get up.

I make my way up to his room and hold my breath as I knock on the door.

"Come in." I hear his voice on the other side of the door.

I walk in and see him sitting at the foot of his bed, udjusting his boot. I walk over and sit down next to him, "What's going on with you?"

He shakes his head, "Nothing."

I sigh, "I know you, Brennen. What's going on?"

He rolls his eyes, "Seriously, Jules. I'm fine."

"You can always talk to me. You know that, right?" I voice.

He finally looks at me, "Oh, please, Jules. Don't act like you care now."

I frown, "What?"
He stands up and turns to me, "I can always talk to you? Where have you been for the last four years? Huh?"

"You're the one who moved away!" I snap back.

He scoffs, "You could've called, Jules! You had my number! If you really cared, you could've called and checked!"
I looked at him in disbelief, confused by where this all was coming from, "A phone works both ways, Brennen!"

He looked at me, not saying a word but I couldn't stand being in the same room as him anymore. I stand up and glare at him, fighting back my tears, "You know I care, Brennen. I've always cared. But how was I supposed to know where we stood after what happened?"

He still doesn't say a word and I don't wait for a response, I turn around and walk to my room. I close the door and fall onto my bed before the tears come running down my face.

~~~~~~~~~

I bussed my last table and began wiping the table down, my feet were aching and I just wanted to go home and cry. Taylor was off tonight and I was working with some girl named Stacy, she was nice. But I felt more comfortable working with Taylor.

"Jules." I hear a voice say.

I turn around and see Josh standing there smiling at me, "Hey, Josh."

I haven't seen him since I ditched him at Garrett's birthday party to go hookup with Brennen. Looking back, I wondered how different things could've been for me if I didn't do that.

"How have you been?" He asks.

"Good, pretty busy." I answer, "What about you?"

"Same old school and stuff." He smiles.

I nod before he speaks again, "When do you get off?"

I look at the clock hanging on the wall next to us, "In like 30 minutes."

"You wanna hangout or something?" He asks.

I stared at him, I really did want to hang out with him but I just couldn't. I couldn't jump into something new knowing a part of me was still in love with Brennen.

"I can't." I sigh.

"Oh, okay. What about tomorrow?"

"No, Josh. I just can't." I say.

"You can't hang out or you can't start something with me?" He questions.

"You're a really cool guy but I just can't be in a relationship right now." I explain.

He nods as he looks at the ground, "Is it because of him?"

I knew he was talking about Brennen and it killed me, I couldn't hurt him even more than I already was, "No. It's not him. I just don't have time for anything serious right now."

"Gottcha," He sighs, "Damn, I thought I had it this time." He adds.

"I'm sorry." I reply.

"It's cool. I'll see ya around, Jules." He smiles before turning around and walking away.

I let out a heavy breath as I watched him leave. I really hope I didn't lose something good for something that wasn't worth fighting for.