Angelo
1994
Adina's POV
"Hey, what's up with you comin' home late and rarely bein' at the house, Dina baby?" My mom asks me as I eat breakfast.
"Uh..I've just been at Deshaun's a whole lot. That's all." I shrug.
I've been comin back home usually high as fuck almost every night and I know my parents ain't happy about it.
Since my dad's been occupied with work, ion think he seems to really notice or have the time to ask... and my mom has been with Mama P, giving her company most of the time but my moms obviously catching on.
I hate lying to my mom though. I really do.
"I mean, yeah.. I'm sure of that, Dina. But,... ion know baby- I'm just worried about ya."
"I promise I'm alright. I'm usually just stayin' up all night playin' games with Marsh- or- I mean, Deshaun or one of his friends."
I fucked up.
"Marshall?...I thought you guys didn't talk no more?" My mamas eyebrows draw together.
"I mean, we don't. It's just every now and then he'll be at Deshaun's crib."
"He ain't causin' my baby no trouble, right?" She asks.
"Nah, everything is neutral between us. We'll play the game every now and then, I'll say hi, he'll say hi. That's really it though." I lie straight outta my ass as I put my dishes away before grabbing my bag.
"Okay, good. I was just makin' sure, sweetheart...I love you...Have a good day at work." My mother still seems unsure.
"I love you too, mama, I'll try." I give my mom a kiss on the cheek before making my way to the front door as I put my coat on with my keys in hand.
It's getting closer and closer or Christmas and I still don't know what to get nobody as a present... I mean imma obviously get Rufus some damn food.. wit his hefty ass... and I'm getting Deshaun a new record player, cause I know he been needin one. But what about Marshall?
I don't have a clue on what I should get him... I mean I do. But I just wanna make sure it's right.
...I'm thinking about buying Nas' Illmatic record for him, he's been going absolutely crazy about it and he won't stop talkin' about it and shit...so that could be something.
But is it enough? Ion know, yo... I wanna make sure I get him something that he genuinely wants...
Should I even be stressin' over this shit so heavily?.. he ain't even my damn boyfriend.
But I want him to be...god, why hasn't he asked me out yet, yo. What's goin on??
I mean I know I could just do it myself but I'm far too scared of rejection to even think about doing it myself.
Why can't he just be straightforward with me???....maybe he is, his straightforwardness is not saying anything about having an official relationship..
fuck, yo...I hate feelin' this way.
I bet he barely even thinks about me when I'm not around him...
is he fuckin' other girls, yo?
My blood boils thinkin' about the shit...
Ugh, I need to get outta my head about this.
You ain't even datin' him, Adina!...But I want to so baddd!
...it's way too early for this shit.
I need to get to work, for real.
Forget Marshall... just worry about it later.
