Pulling medical conditions out of our ass

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The following week at school goes well. No alarms, no surprises, just casual routine. Serpe is quite relieved; finally he can catch his breath… UNTIL!
A student knocks on his door worriedly and tells him a teacher fell down the stairs.
 
S: What? Who?
Stu: Mr. Levitski, he didn’t seem hurt but-
S:  *gets up from his chair* Where is he right now?
Stu: T-the nurse’s office.
S: *rushes out of the room*
 
As he’s heading to the nurse’s office, he is making all kinds of awful scenarios in his mind. When he finally gets there, he finds Vitch laying in one of the nursing beds. He looks ok, so why is he here? He walks up to him and in a panic he starts bombarding him with questions.
 
S: What happened? Did you break anything? Why are you here?
V: Whoa whoa, calm down, I fell down the stairs, I didn’t hurt anything, the kids brought me here.
S: That’s a relief.
V: Aaw look at you getting all worked up about me.
S: (///) Well you clearly didn’t get hurt, so why are you still here?
V: Umm…
S: And why are you looking at the poster behind me so intensely?
V: Uuh, I like it, it’s… a good poster.
S: It’s a “hang in there” poster.
V: It’s a nice message. u u
S: Mr Levitski, what’s going on?
V: …You know how I’m from the owl tribe?
S: Yes?
V: And you know how our eyes glow a certain way?
S: You could say that.
V: Well… with my eyes, whenever they glow, uh, they sort of burn themselves
S: What?
V: Let me explain. I was born with a deficiency in my eyes. I am missing the protective tissue that is between my pupil and the part of my eye that makes it glow. So whenever I make my eyes glow there is nothing to filter the light and I slowly get blind. Right now I can barely see.
S: Oh my god. Are you going blind by the day?!
V: Sort of.
S: Then why would you make them glow!? You’ve done it on multiple occasions!! Are you stupid?!!!
V: Well, it’s kind of a double-edged sword. I may be getting blind using the glow, but if I successfully receive pheromones they counter the effects of the light.
S: You heal your eyes by having sex?
V: Yes. And when I can’t get pheromones that way, I have this. *pulls out an empty bottle of eye drops* Unfortunately I didn’t realize I ran out before leaving home today, hence this catastrophe~
S: What do you need me to do?
V: A kiss would be nice.
S: *without thinking he takes Vitch’s face and leans in*
V: Oh *he gets excited, he didn’t think Serpe was actually going to do it*
 
*smooch <3*
 
S: *loading*
V: You silly goose. That was nice of you, but what I really need are some more eye drops. I’d go get them myself, but ya know, blind.
S: *gasp* Why didn’t you say that sooner. *grabs the empty bottle* You’re such a jerk. *leaves*
V: *chuckles*
 
As Serpe is walking to the pharmacy he is thinking to himself: “What a stupid trick I fell for. And right at the school too. What if somebody had seen us? How could I have acted so carelessly? When I’m around him, I can’t think at all. Which is precisely why I need to stay away from him! So why can’t I?” He continues his inner monologue as he purchases the medicine and hurries back to Vitch.
When he returns, on his way to the infirmary he overhears the students gossiping about him. How come he dealt with such a matter personally, they wondered. Usually, Mr Pirovano doesn’t have time for anything other than work, let alone time to care for someone.
 
S: (Ugh, this is definitely going to be an issue, but I can’t let it distract me right now.)
 
At last, he delivers the medicine to the blind man.
 
V: Thanks for the trouble, and, could I ask for one more thing?
S: As long as it’s not another kiss.
V: No, nothing like that, heh. I want you to keep this a secret.
S: A secret? Why?
V: Well I wouldn’t really want that type of thing getting out, you know?
S: Very well, I understand. I will keep this between us.
V: I owe you one Serpe.
S: …Anything else?
V: No that’s all. I will resume class as soon as I am able.
S: Take your time, wouldn’t want you to fall down the stairs again.
V: Will do.

Over the night Vitch comes up with the perfect plan to repay Serpe, so the next day he visits his office.
 
V: Good morning boss~
S: Morning. *he is too focused on his work, he does not lift his eyes from his computer*
V: Hmpf. *he walks up to Serpe, pulls his chair and proceeds to sit on his lap, just to make sure he has his full attention. He grabs his face and turns it to meet his gaze* Be a good boy now and look at me.
S: :0 (///) I have work to do you dimwit, get off me!
V: Ah look at you, working so hard, you deserve a reward~
S: N-not here. Can’t you keep it in your pants?
V: So dirty minded. For your information, I was referring to treating you to dinner tonight. U U
S: Dinner?
V: My place, 7pm, whaddaya say?
S: I’ll think about it.
V: I’ll be waiting for you, my little solntse~~

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