My husband hates me

Chapter 11

"You killed my child..." The young woman's voice trembled as she sat in the car. It seemed she was exhausted, her skin-colored shawl slipping from her shoulders with the car's turn. Unconcerned that it no longer covered her head, she disregarded its presence entirely.

Beside her, the man barely glanced her way as she wept bitterly. Her tears, a lament for the child she had unknowingly carried within her.

"Stop crying, it's giving me a headache," he commanded, but her tears persisted, stoking her anger. "Saad, I know you despise me. But it was yours as well... how aren't you guilty?"

Saad's expression twisted with irritation, devoid of remorse or guilt. He cared naught for the young life sacrificed in a fit of passion, a fact that disgusted her.

"A child that came from you doesn't deserve to live.."

"Why keep me alive? Why not end me? Those you despise have no right to live...".

Tears dropped from her eyes, as she cried, the car came to a stop at the mansion and Seher looked frightened. She didn't wanted to return to this prison again, when Saad exited the vehicle, Seher didn't move. She sat in the car, "Seher let's go inside".

He said a little calmly now, pulling her hand to get her attention. She took a deep breath and looked into his eyes, "Divorce me".

A sense of shock flickered across his eyes, swiftly consumed by seething rage. "You want to leave me?"

Seher nodded, a glimmer of hope for empathy dwindling, yet his laughter shattered it. He yanked her out forcefully, gripping her chin, his obsidian gaze piercing as he spelled out his control.

"You'll depart when death claims you. And I decide when that time comes... understand?" Disgust clouded Seher's eyes; unable to contain her revulsion, she spat out vehemently, "I pray for your eternal torment, for you to shed tears and feel the pain you have inflicted on me. I curse you!"

A hysterical laughter bubbled from deep within her, echoing through the desolate room. The laughter, discordant and hollow, masked the maelstrom of emotions that swirled beneath her.

Her legs were trembling, her body weak but the rage was making her blood boil. This man was a tyrant had no feelings of his own, he was cruel. On the ground she could see herself bleeding, reliving the trauma that this man implicted on her. Her world turned blurry and as her eyes closed she realised, she was too weak for this world.

----

As Seher stirred, her eyes opened to the bed. An elderly woman sat nearby, prayer beads rolling between weathered fingers. Seher's gaze fell upon the marble floor, the very surface that had absorbed her blood, silently bearing witness to the horrors of that night.

"You're awake," the woman noted, rising to check Seher's temperature. "It seems you're recovering." Recovering? How could she ever heal? She no longer cared about her own well-being. Closing her eyes, she envisioned an alternate world, where echoes of a little baby's laughter resonated as she playfully chased after her.

Her chest tightened, tears welled up anew, and she crumbled to the floor in anguish. She was weary of tears, of this profound vulnerability. Her cheek met the cool floor, and though the elderly woman urged her to rise, Seher remained motionless.

Amidst the silence, a child's voice giggled, softly whispering, "Mama." A fleeting smile graced Seher's face as she reached out, her heart brimming with affection for the little baby beside her. But in an instant, the child vanished. She had failed. She was a feeble mother who couldn't shield her child, who couldn't safeguard them before they even came into the world.

Determined to honor the memory of her lost child, she found solace in a peculiar ritual. She began to collect tiny clothes, vibrant and full of life, the kind she would have chosen for her little one.

The delicate fabrics and miniature sizes became a bittersweet reminder of what could have been. The old woman observed Seher's newfound routine, sensing a quiet strength blossoming within her.

Though tears often accompanied these shopping trips, Seher persevered for the next few months. As she lovingly folded each garment, she whispered words of endearment to the unseen presence that lingered in her heart.

Through these acts, she found a way to channel her sorrow into something tangible, a gesture of love and reverence for the child she had lost before truly knowing. The room that once bore witness to tragedy now echoed with the soft rustle of cherished memories, woven into every stitch and seam of those tiny clothes.

___

His wife’s room, where he hadn’t come for a long time, had noticeably changed. The largest room in the mansion was hers, but the arrangement always remained the same.

It was always warm and clean.

Saad always felt that way when he entered  Seher’s room. But today was different. His wife’s room did not look like what he was used to.

The room was messy compared to the time it was neat and tidy. It was littered with baby items and small toys were rolling on the floor. Not only that, there was a small cradle next to the bed, and a small mat spread out on the left side of the bed. With the changed atmosphere that was scratching on his nerves, Saad’s judgment became twisted when he realised the woman had become crazier than ever.

“Hey, you haven’t done any of your responsiblities for a month now. Actually what have you done since last five months, was it warming my bed for months and unable to give me a proper heir?"

Horrified, Seher was in tears. She didn’t want to listen, but every word that entered her ears was so sharp that she couldn’t ignore it.

Warm up his bed.

But the more painful words were all related to her being a useless mother...

Saad moved his hands. With one movement, her disheveled robe flowed down easily.

“Do your job”

He kissed her tearful eyes and slowly pushed her down. Her eyes grew briefly dark, dead staring at the ceiling.

___

Black hair spread across the white bed that made the pale woman’s face stand out. Saad stroked her face over and over again with his calloused hands.

“Don’t cry.”

His lips brushed her red eyes, then her cheeks, grazing her red lips and then stopped.

The man had cloudy eyes filled with lust. He stroked his wife’s round shoulders and lowered his gaze down to her neck. Her white and smooth curves were beautiful.

She was his property, but unfortunately, he had only been able to look at it for two months. He leaned his head down without hesitation. As the distance between them grew closer, his wife looked all the more prettier. Saad kissed her a few more times as if to prepare.

“I said… Haah …… Don’t cry.”

Looking her tears, he clenched his teeth rubbing her face with his rough hand.

After a while, the man’s long sigh signaled the end. He lowered his hand and grabbed her cheek, giving her a deep kiss. Seher, who had exhausted all of her strength, relaxed her body without even blinking her eyes.

After that day, Saad constantly looked for her. Seher closed her eyes and bit her lips every time he came, but she didn’t say anything. Taking off her robe and getting to bed quietly became part of her routine.

At evening when she was resting in her room, there was a knock at her door. 

"Madam I found this at the balcony", the old servant Rabia passed her the ribbon. Seher gazed at it, touching the silk, it was given to her by Saahil.

"If I didn't return keep this with you, it was my mother's", he had said as he softly entwined their fingers, their was love in his eyes and a lingering sadness.

His love remained the haunting refrain, a melody she couldn't help but hum with the silence of her desolate heart.