Love after Life

Infinity War

The week's been frustrating. Things between Angie and I have been "weird," to say the least. Our sessions have stopped, and we're kinda not talking as much as we used to. I felt as though she lost interest in me, and that broke my heart.

"Sorry I can't go to the gym today," I wrote to her on Friday morning. "I promised my son I'd take him to watch the new Avengers movie."

An hour later, as I was taking the coffee break, she texted back. "It's cool; Sam asked me to take her roommate to see that same movie tonight."

The roommate, the beautiful model who was hot enough to get anyone she wanted. I've lost...

That afternoon, as promised, I took Kyle to the mall to see that new Avengers movie. I think it was called Infinite War or something, I wasn't sure. I also took Shawna, though I did kinda had to drag her to come. Tony, however, outright stated he had no interest in coming. So much for a Family Movie Outing...

I was SHOCKED to see the massive line of cinema goers all waiting to buy a ticket for the five PM showing of the movie! Thankfully, Gabe had convinced me to pre-buy tickets online, even showing me how to print them at the ticket booth at the theater! Hehe, no long line for us!

"Yo," I heard a very familiar voice from behind me as I printed three of the four tickets I bought (goddammit, Tony...) It was Gabe! Kyle rushed to hug his uncle, and I smiled at him.

"Cousin, hey," I said as I hugged him. "Here for the movie?"

"Got the ticket and everything," he said, showing off his ticket. "You kids excited?"

"Heck yeah!" Said Kyle, and Shawna shrugged.

"Not a fan of the Avengers, kiddo?" Gabe asked Shawna.

"Meh," Shawna replied. "I don't like superhero movies."

"Oh, too bad," said Gabe.

"Yoooo, Gabe!" Said a tall-ish, slender man with a receding hairline. "We buyin' the snacks or what?"

"OH MY GOD, IT'S TODD JOHNSON!" Kyle exclaimed, jumping up and down in excitement. "DUDE, I WATCH YOUR STREAMS!"

"Oh, a fan?" The man, Todd Johnson, gave Kyle a big smile. "Always good to meet a fan! What's your name, kiddo?"

"Kyle Tanner, sir!" Kyle replied, turning to me and pointing at Todd Johnson. "Mom, it's Todd Johnson, the best streamer in the world!"

"Nah, not the best," Todd Johnson laughed. "I mean, MAYBE in the area, but the world?"

"Don't feed this dude's ego, kid," Gabe said, grinning. "The rest of his hair will fall off."

"Screw you, man," said Todd, and I could tell these two were just ribbing on each other in a friendly way.

I joined Gabe for the snacks line, taking my kids with me so they wouldn't wander off or get lost. After getting the snacks, we ran into a jaw droppingly gorgeous redheaded woman.

"Yo, Gabe," said the redhead, with another redheaded boy beside her. "Oh, hey! Gabe's cousin! How you doin', girl?"

"You remembered me?" I asked, blushing a bit. "Uh, Daisy, right?"

"Yeah!" She said as we shook hands. "Ain't seen ya since your wedding!"

"You haven't changed since then," I said, feeling a bit hot in the face.

"Yeah, same to you!" She replied. "If you hadn't brought the baby to the wedding, I'd never guess you were a mom!"

"Twice, actually," I said, as I pointed to my kids. "This is my daughter, Shawna, and this is my son, Kyle."

"Oh, hey, I met you as a baby!" Daisy said to Shawna. "This is my baby bro, Kevin!"

"Hey," said the redheaded boy, Kevin.

"H-hey," said Shawna, blushing like crazy.

OH HELL NO! Can't let my daughter fall for a guy at fifteen!

After a good chat, and a bit of catching up, we all decided to enter the theater and get to our seats. By sheer luck (or maybe Gabe planned it this way) we all managed to sit close to each other. I made sure Shawna stayed away from that Kevin, though!

One movie later...

As we drove back home from the mall, Kyle asked me a question. "Mom, do you like girls?"

"What?" I asked.

"I saw that you looked at that woman the way Shawna looked at that guy," said Kyle matter-of-factly.

"What?" I pretended to be surprised, but I was more scared than anything. I didn't want my kids to get the wrong idea, after all.

"It was so gross, Mom," said Shawna, making a face at me. "You were practically drooling!"

"I wasn't-"

"Mom?" Kyle piped up. "I'm OK with you liking girls."

"What?" That legit caught me off guard.

"It's OK if you like girls, Mom," said Kyle. "Cuz that sort of thing is OK."

"You mean it?" I asked, shocked.

"Yeah."

"And you, Shawna?" I asked.

"I'm creeped out that you looked at someone other than Dad that way," Shawna said, crossing her arms and looking out the window. That was fair.

"Well," I began. "Truth is... I think I do like girls. And... these emotions are new to me, so I'm still trying to figure myself out."

"Does Dad know?" Asked Shawna, looking surprised.

"I'll talk to him about it as soon as I can," I said, sighing to myself. "When he's not so busy, because you know how he is."

Much later that night...

One in the morning. Tony and I never did have that talk about me liking women; in fact, he didn't want to talk at all. By ten PM he was already in bed, snoring away. Myself, I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to talk to Angie; I didn't even want a session, I just wanted to talk to her. I grabbed my tablet and headed to the bathroom, locking the door.

"Hey," I texted her via Skype.

"Hey," she replied soon after. "Sorry I been weird; been dealing with emotions."

"It's OK," I said, sighing. "How was the date?"

"She was OK," she replied. "Loved to talk movies; in fact, she wouldn't shut up about them, LOL."

I giggled a bit.

"The date was totally platonic," she wrote. "She showed no interest in me. She seemed more concerned with talking my ear off about all her favorite movies and directors, most of which I had never even heard of. Plus she's too into video games, something I could never get into. And in any case, she's not my type."

I sighed in relief. But seriously? A girl like HER being into video games? Aren't those kid's stuff?

"I missed you," I wrote.

"Me too," she replied. "I'm scared, though. Scared of my feelings."

"I understand," I said. "I'm scared of mine, too."

Do you know what that's like? To feel so strongly for someone, but knowing you can't be together because you're already married? To know that these emotions are nothing but a betrayal of everything you've stood for, everything you've done, every sacrifice you've made?

As horrible as it sounds, I'd far, far rather lose Tony than lose Angie. And that made me feel like the worst person in the world.