Flare | Young Justice

Nightmare of Regrets and Shame

|Mount Justice: October 16, 16:20 EDT|

As my eyes snapped open, the whiteness of the room seemed to mock the darkness of my nightmare. The simulation—it had been so real, so terrifyingly real. I sat up, my heart still hammering against my ribs, as if trying to break free from the cage of my bones.

"Artemis," I murmured to myself as I looked up staring at Artemis from across the room, the guilt clawing at my insides like a living thing. She had been right there, within reach, and yet I hadn't moved. Not an inch. As her body vaporized in my mind's eye, I felt my hands shake. We had been fighting a battle we were never meant to win, but that didn't excuse my inaction.

"Hey, you alright?" came a voice from across the room. It was Robin, his domino mask sitting askew on his face as he rubbed his temples to soothe the ache.

"Yeah," I replied, forcing a semblance of calm into my voice. "Never been better," I joked.

"Same here," he admitted, and there was a shared understanding in his tone. We'd all seen too much in that damned simulation.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed, feeling the chill of the floor against my bare feet. "What time is it?"

"Late," Robin answered. "But, Too late for dinner, even for Wally."

A ghost of a smile tugged at my lips at the mention of our perpetually hungry friend. But the heaviness in my chest wouldn't lift. It was like a shroud, suffocating and unrelenting.

We hung our heads low as we heard the echoing sobs of M'gann after the realization that she was the one who unknowingly twisted our simulation for the worse.

"Kaldur..." I started softly, the image of him standing resolute, ready to sacrifice himself, playing on a loop in my mind. "He shouldn't have done that."

Robin's gaze met mine, serious and somber. "He did what he thought he had to do."

"But it was just a simulation!" I stood abruptly, my fists clenched at my sides. My gaze fixed on Kaldur, his eyes meeting mine for a brief moment before we both quickly averted our gazes.

I lower my voice and say in a hushed tone, "I should've stopped him. I should've—"

"Would you have listened?" Robin cut in. "If Kaldur had tried to stop you?"

The question hung in the air between us, heavy with unspoken truths. I sank back down, my fight deflating. "No," I admitted. "But that doesn't make it okay."

We were silent then, lost in our own thoughts. The guilt was a relentless tide, washing over me again and again.

I lazily glanced around the room. "None of this is real, right?" I asked suddenly, needing to hear it out loud, needing the affirmation. "We're all still here?"

"Every last one of us," Robin assured me, but his voice lacked its usual lighthearted lilt.

I nodded, staring at my hands as if they could give me the answers I sought. Why am I still here? What does the Light want from me? Questions without answers, a puzzle missing pieces.

Robin stood up and slowly made his way out of the room. The training is over and sitting on this table-shaped bed is the only thing I could think of doing right now.

I doubted anything could sweep away the shadows that clung to my soul.

I left the room after all my teammates exited the room. We were more than just teammates on a mission, we were bound by our shared secrets and fears. We carried the weight of knowing that sometimes, being a hero isn't enough to save everyone, including ourselves.