𝑘𝑖𝑠𝑠 𝑚𝑒 𝑜𝑛𝑐𝑒 | 𝑤𝑜𝑜𝑠𝑎𝑛

☆ - 3

╳°»｡ ∾･⁙･ ღ ➵ ⁘ ➵ ღ ･⁙･∾ ｡«°╳

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🖤🌑☂️☾✧☽☂️🌑🖤

- 𝕋ℍℝ𝔼𝔼 -

𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕕

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as much as san hated to admit it he went to the back area rather quickly, eager to see wonho after so long.

hongjoong could wait, he thought. and he smiled at the other bouncer who let him past- thanking him before moving towards one of the break rooms. san opened the door slowly, poking his head in the room. it was rather quiet aside from the soft voices that spilled from the tv. the room was an okay size, had a couch and chairs, a table of snacks and a microwave no one really used. it had a mini fridge and a door leading to a bathroom- a typical break room he supposed.

and on the sofa, sat the man he'd been looking for; eyes trained to the tv- blonde hair with blue tips highlighted by the light casted from the screen in the otherwise dark room. he looked like an angel in sans eyes- and san thought he should be the one called that, not him.

with a smile he shut the door behind him, unknowingly present for wonho. san tiptoed behind the older, leaning down a bit and quickly clamping his hands over his eyes- feeling him stiffen slightly under him before relaxing once san spoke.

"guess who?" his voice came out soft, deep, and honey like. he hadn't even meant to use that voice with him- had forced himself to stop once he found out that hyungwon and wonho were together. but it seemed being away from him so long had made him forget about that rule.

"san~" wonho smiled, and san thought he died. the first time in over a week he had heard someone call him by his real name, and it was wonho out of all people.

"mmm, hi." san dropped his hands, walking around the couch and plopping himself onto wonho, arms latched around his shoulders and face buried in his chest.

"hey little one, ate tonight?" wonho asked, turning down the sound of the tv a little.

"no, just got here, had a client tonight and he was so terrible, hoseok." san frowned, sniffling a bit. at this wonho pulled him closer, frowning too. he hated that san did this, he hated that he couldn't protect him better. if he could he would become his legal guardian or something- but he doubted hyungwon would agree or san would even want that.

"what did he do, little one?" he spoke slowly, carefully- he didn't want to trigger san.

"didn't listen to the rules... left marks, choked me.... kissed me-" he whispered, hiding deeper into wonho chest when the older tightened his grip.

"he did?" san nodded, "how old was he?" wonho spoke through clenched teeth.

"i dunno, fourty five, maybe fifty? had a wife and kids too..." wonho stayed quiet, feeling san let out a shaky breath in his grasp. he should've protected him.

"you need to eat, san."

"i want to cuddle."

"you always want to cuddle," wonho chuckled, and san only snuggled closer to him.

"yeah, with you." he mumbled, but wonho heard it, and he shifted a bit. "why not with hongjoong, he missed you lots you know?"

"nah, you're softer and cuddle better, and hongjoong would just scold me- i'm saving that for later."

wonho stayed quiet for a bit, and started to stroke the boys back, "he's only worried about you, san."

san leaned back a bit, looking up at hoseok with a roll of his eyes, "you think i want him to be? i don't want to bother anyone anymore, i'm sick of making him have to look after me- he shouldn't have to deal with me."

"san, you were gone for over a week, we had no way of contacting you and you don't have a place to stay. of course we were worried." san could tell wonho was getting upset, his ears started to turn red and he sighs a lot.

san felt bad now.

"you aren't a bother, or a burden- san we all care about you so much. we want to take care of you, make sure your safe- hongjoong wants that more than anybody. i want that more than anybody, understand?" san hated how his chest fluttered, how his face grew warm- he hated how his eyes caught stuck on wonho lips.

he only wanted a kiss, one kiss couldn't hurt, could it?

he saw the confusion in wonho eyes, but he couldn't stop thinking about how soft his lips looked. "san, do you understand what i'm saying?" wonho repeated, and sans eyes finally pulled away from the older lips. "mhm," san shifted on his lap- and let out a deep sigh, unconsciously rolling his hips a bit.

what am i doing?

san felt sick, sick that he wanted to kiss him so bad, sick that his body was going into work mode, doing little things here and there to make himself more attractive, to turn wonho on. he hated how badly he wanted the older to kiss him, did he actually like wonho, or did he like the attention? he didn't know, but he felt terrible about it. he hated how prone his body had become to acting this way. that his body resorted in moving like that whenever he was around men, older men mostly- he was so used to it, and being attracted to wonho wasn't helping anything.

a slut, that's all i am.

san didn't notice the tears that slipped down his face, or the way his body started to shake. didn't realize it until wonho started to thumb away at them, too used to this scene occurring. it was a sad, depressing routine for san to break down across wonho lap. wonho only shushed the boys sobs, holding him close to let it out all. sans tears staining his shirt and the sight was a heartbreaking one. wonho had to stay strong, he didn't always know what was going on in sans head to make him break down- it was different a lot of the time. so he only whispered soft words of encouragement, telling him it was okay- telling him he wasn't things he knew the boy was calling himself.

and the two stayed like that for far too long.

╳°»｡ ∾･⁙･ ღ ➵ ⁘ ➵ ღ ･⁙･∾ ｡«°╳

oh my gosh

i am so unbelievably tired

but anywho did fucking minkyun go to the military? (mk from onf) while i was sleeping?

CUS WTFFFF THATS SO MEAN NOOO MY BABY FUCK

also this book is like rlly emotion heavy so yeee

i hope you like it so far!! comment lots

~ lix ~

╳°»｡ ∾･⁙･ ღ ➵ ⁘ ➵ ღ ･⁙･∾ ｡«°╳