One Helluva Ride

Chapter 29: Disaster

           A soft groan escaped Splice's lips as they woke up. They used one arm to prop up the upper half of their body, gently rubbing the sleep from their eyes with the other. Their head ached with a pulsating pain from their hangover. "Morning, sleeping beauty." A voice called. Splice's eyes shot open. Laying about a foot away from them was Fizzarolli.

          "Wh- I- how did.. what?!" Splice stuttered, their gaze darting around in confusion. Fizzarolli sat up. "I take it you don't remember last night?" He asked. Splice's eyebrows furrowed. "Uh- no? What happened..?" They said. Fizzarolli deadpanned. "Look around and take a guess." He replied sarcastically.

           Splice took this moment to take in their surroundings. In front of them was Fizzarolli in nothing but his boxers. His clothes were haphazardly thrown around the room. They could vaguely see a few discarded condoms. Their eyes widened. "Holy shit.. did you and I..?" They couldn't bring themself to finish their question. Fizzarolli smirked in response.

          "Not just you and I." The clown corrected with a grin. Splice blinked confusedly. "Then who-" Before they could finish their question, Fizzarolli gestured beneath the two of them. Splice's gaze followed. They felt as their cheeks flushed. "No.." They whispered, in complete disbelief. "We- I- are you serious?" Fizzarolli nodded. "Oh, fuck." Splice whined. "I slept with the sin of Lust..?"

          Fizzarolli's eyes narrowed. "You slept with me too, y'know." He replied. Splice waved a hand dismissively. "That's not the most pressing concern. I've slept with imps before. Shit, I've slept with overlords before! Even cherubs! But the sin of Lust?!" They ranted in a whisper-shout, running a hand through their hair.

          "Fuck me." Splice whined, burying their face in their hands. Fizzarolli stifled a chuckle. "We did that already." He replied. Splice shoved him somewhat playfully. "Not what I meant." They said. Fizzarolli stuck out his tongue with a cheeky smile.

          Splice, desperate to change the subject, switched their focus to their missing clothes. "So, uh.. where'd my clothes go?" They asked, feeling as their cheeks burned with embarrassment. Fizzarolli's head tilted to the side. "Oh, they're being washed. You practically tore them off as soon as we got here." He answered. Splice's eyebrows furrowed. "You're.. washing my clothes?" They said confusedly.

          Fizzarolli shrugged. "We have someone who comes in here every morning to collect laundry. They just happened to pick up your stuff, too." He explained. Splice let out a groan, facepalming. "Damnit." They muttered. Fizzarolli got up. "Don't worry, I've got stuff you can borrow." He said, approaching his closet.

           "I'm not wearing any of your clown shit." Splice said, trying to peer over at what Fizzarolli was grabbing. He laughed. "I wouldn't give that to you, anyway. Mammon would kill me." He replied, continuing to look through a few articles of clothing before finally settling on something. He returned to Splice with an oversized t-shirt and a pair of underwear.

          "Uh.. thanks." Splice muttered as they took the clothes from Fizzarolli's arms. He shrugged. "No problem. I wouldn't make you leave naked. Especially not in Lust." He replied, shuddering a little at the thought. Splice shook their head with a soft chuckle. "Yeah.. that probably wouldn't go well." They said as they dressed themself.

          Now that the clothes problem was solved, Splice's mind went on to other things. "So- uh- how much do you wanna bet that Asmodeus remembers everything?" They asked. Fizzarolli waved a hand dismissively. "I'm sure he won't. Plus, I won't say anything if you don't." He said with a smirk. Splice rolled their eyes playfully. "Right. Got it." They replied.

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          Splice stumbled into their apartment, leaning on the doorframe for support. "Where've you been?" A voice asked. Splice flinched. "Shit! Blitzø.. don't scare me like that." They muttered, letting out a soft sigh. Blitzø rolled his eyes. "You weren't home last night." He said. Splice shrugged. "So?" They questioned, trying to prompt more out of Blitzø.

          "No one knew where you were. You could've gotten into trouble." Blitzø scolded. Splice rolled their eyes, collapsing onto their couch. "Why does it matter? You're my boss, not my boyfriend." They replied sarcastically.

          Blitzø went quiet, crossing his arms over his chest. "Where were you?" He asked again. Splice buried their face into a throw pillow. "The Lust ring." They answered, still exhausted from their hangover. Blitzø's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What were you doing there?" He wondered aloud. Splice rolled onto their back. "Oh, relax, dad. I was born there, I can make my way around without getting hurt." They said scornfully.

          It was quiet for a few moments. Neither of the imps really knew what to say. ".. you look tired." Blitzø finally remarked. Splice chuckled. "You could say that." They replied. Their appearance was messy and unkempt–they definitely looked like they'd been through the ringer. "Rough night?" Blitzø asked.

          Splice sighed softly. ".. yeah." They answered. Blitzø nodded, letting out a bitter chuckle. "Me too." He muttered, sitting on the far side of the couch. He buried his face into his hands. "Well, at least we feel shitty together." Splice joked, looking over at Blitzø with a goofy smile. He couldn't help but smile in return as he tried to stifle a chuckle. "Yeah..." He trailed off.