Ephemeral - Alia Dixon

3

My jaw almost falls to the ground as my dad drives towards the gate with a motorcycle looking fucking badass. He had even showered and was wearing new clothes.
I can't contain the smile on my face.
"You've got a bike now?" I ask him and he chuckles proudly. 
"Aaron had it in his garage but didn't know what to do with it" he says and I look at him questioningly.
"So, you and Aaron are friends now?" I ask and he quickly answers.
"No, no, definitely not"
I chuckle at my father, crossing my arms over my chest before my face grows serious. "Stay safe"
"You too" he says, giving me a fist bump before the gates open and he drives off. Aaron waves at me from his car which I happily return. I watch as they drive away my face growing a little worried. Dad's recruiting now with Aaron which is by far the most dangerous job here if you ask me. Next to what Glenn, Noah and Tara are doing of course.

That's why it doesn't even shock me when they return all bloody, two of them missing and Tara bleeding.
"Where's Noah?" I ask but no answer, just sad looks. A tear rolls down my face which I don't even attempt to wipe away. They carry Tara into the infirmary while we all wait outside for her to be okay. Eugene was saying something about a headtrauma or something. I hope she'll be okay again, though I know she will. 
Noah was a nice guy. We didn't know him well or for long but he was polite and honest. Funny too.
When Glenn tells Rick what happened, I patiently listen standing behind them quietly. That stupid prick Nicholas left them all to die. Just because he didn't work with them, Aiden had to die. Aiden was an idiot but he didn't deserve all of this. Neither did Noah. It's clear that Glenn had to see it by the look on his face. 
I don't want to listen more than necessary though, so I leave to go back to our place. 
People are going to die, I know that. I'm well aware of that but not half of them have to or had to. Mostly it's a humans fault another human has to die. Not the walkers. 

The next day is pretty much the same as all the others here. Actually, I'm getting kind of bored here. I want to help. I want to go outside but my dad strictly forbid it for now, especially when he's not around to come with us. 
Just as I walk around the corner, I see Rick and someone else fighting on the street, glass surrounding them. Ron's mom is crying for her husband under Rick's hands who seems to be loosing this fight bitterly. I run over towards Carl who's watching the scene with wide eyes. I search the area for Sam and find him clinging to Carol. Just then Ron's dad turns them around and starts choking Rick. My eyes widen at the image. They grow even wider when Ron's mom wants to step in but her husband slaps her hard across the face, causing her to fall back. Carl and I look at eachother and nod before we run over to get Rick off of him before they kill eachother. Blood's smeared on both of their faces, running down onto their clothes or one another. 
Carl gets there first, trying to pull him off but Rick shoves him back, causing him to fall onto his butt. I help him up before walking over there myself, trying to stop him but he shoves me hard, causing me to fall to the floor, bumping my head harshly. I groan as my head harshly lands on the floor and everything seems to become irrelevant for a second. No noises, not a feeling in the world as I forget what's even going on right now. I open my eyes again to be met by the sun shining directly into my face, causing me to groan again as the blur infront of me slowly begins to become clear again. My eyes widen when I see Rick with the gun in his hand, pointing it at Deanne, who's trying to talk to him. Carl and Enid help me to sit upright while we wall watch.
"You gonna kick me out?" Rick asks. "You still don't get it. None of you do! We know what needs to be done and we do it. We're the ones who live. You, you just sit and plan and hesitate. You pretend like you know when you don't. You wish things weren't what they are. Well, you want to live? You want this place to stay standing? Your way of doing things is done. Things don't get better because you want them to. Starting right now, we have to live in the real world. We have to control who lives here"
"That's never been more clear to me than it is right now" Deanne says spitefull, making me look at her with a clenched jaw.
"Me? Me? You," Rick says laughing. "You mean me? Your way is gonna destroy this place. It's gonna get people killed. It's already gotten people killed. And I'm not gonna stand by and just let it happen. If you don't fight, you die. I'm not gonna stand by-" 
Michonne finally interrupts him by knocking him out cold with a punch and taking the gun from him.
"Thank god" I mutter annoyedly. Rick has maybe just blew all our chances of living here. Yes, these people don't know anything about what they're doing but we could at least help them or try to talk. No, instead everyone has to go behind eachother's backs.