rainbow Umbrella

16

Sa mga nakalipas na araw ay alam kong may iba, alam kong mag a assume nanaman ako sa mga pinapakita niya. Tulad ngayon eto nanaman siya at ginugulo ang utak ko.

"Let's talk." he told me as he look deep into my eyes.

"Talk about what?." I asked confuse 'cause I don't know why we need to talk.

Hinatak niya ako palabas sa room, pumunta kami kung saan kami tumatambay sa malaking puno, kung saan kami nag usap.

Bigla nalang siyang nag bitaw ng mga salitang gugulo nanaman sa akin.

"Stay away from him, I'm jealous." may autoridad na saad nito.

'I really can't predict his next move.'

I can't explain what I feel. I'm confused, hurt and shocked by what he said. Hindi ko maintindihan ano ba ang paniniwalaan ko.

"What the hell, Ainsleigh. Are you messing with me?." I'm pissed right now, he just said that he doesn't like me, that he only thinks of me as a friend. Now he admits that he was jealous.

I didn't pay attention to his actions in the past few days. When he says words that confuse me, all of the actions that makes me want to assume, and didn't even bother to asked him. But I didn't expect this kind of behavior.

"Just do what I told." he was looking at me, he's looking into my soul, parang tinutunaw ako ng mga titig niyang iyon.

Inis akong nagpakawala ng buntong hininga habang titig na titig sa mga mata niya. Nilalabanan ang titig na binibigay niya.

"You can't just order me around!." I said holding back my anger.

I know why he is acting weird right now. I know it's because of Calvin, because we became more and more closer. I don't know where his anger is coming from, 'cause I didn't- we didn't do anything to pissed him of like this. He just saw us together earlier and how Calvin fixed my hair. He then pulled me and said that we should talked.

"Please, Sam. Just do What I told. I'm having a hard time too." I saw how he shut his eyes, restraining himself.

'Having a hard time? Did you think about me before you say those words?.'

"Didn't you think I was having a hard time too?" I bit my lower lip to holding my tears.

"Don't you think I was hurting too?." I was having a hard time saying those words 'cause I feel a lump in my throat, handa ng umiyak. "That with your every move I wonder if it has a meaning o aasa ba ako."

"Because you said na you see me as a friend, pero bakit nag seselos ka ngayon?." nanunumbat ang tinig na 'yon, hindi ko inalis ang mga tingin ko sa kanya. Nakita ko din ang pag daan ng guilt at sakit sa mga mata nito.

'Im so confuse, you're hurting me.'

I'm hurt, I'm hurt because he doesn't even have a reason to say. He couldn't even answer my questions.

'is it that hard to answer my questions?'

Nakaiwas ang mga tingin niya at hindi man lang niya ako magawang tignan sa mata, nakikita kong nasasaktan din siya pero mas nasasaktan ako dahil sa pinapakita niya. Nasasaktan ako sa mga ginawa niya. Ganon niya ako kabilis saktan, isang kilos, salita o galaw ay ang bilis para sa kanya na saktan ako.

A tear fell into my cheeks and I wiped it away angrily. Annoyed because just a few words of his would make me grovel back to him, just a little actions of him would immediately hurt me. I'm mad with myself because I can't even be angry at him.