Red Vs Blue And The Corporal Season 3

Ep 10: Heavy Metal

At the Zanzibar fortress Beach, Sarge was currently explaining his crazy plan to the group.

Sarge: Okay, listen up dirtbags and Grif.

Grif: Hey!

Sarge: Shut it dirtbag, anyway if we're gonna invade this fortress, we need a good game plan. I have got two options we can use.

Steve: What's option one?

Sarge: Will all run straight at the base in a single file line, screaming at the top of our lungs. The enemy will be so flabbergasted, by the time they have a chance to regroup, we'll already be inside.

Tucker: Oh yeah right, they're not gonna get surprised, they're just gonna start mowing us down.

Steve: Why do we have to form a single file line anyway?

Sarge: That's the inherent beauty of the single file line, boys! They can only kill the person in front. So if we order from least important to most important, with Tucker being in the front and me being in the back, then we just might make it through.

Simmons: Don't you think Caboose should be in the back, since he's the one carrying the bomb?

Sarge: Nope, Caboose is in front of me. We need someone in back who can objectively evaluate how the plan is working.

Freya: That is a terrible plan Sarge.

Tucker: Besides, how're you gonna know if it's not working?

Sarge: If Caboose dies, I'll know we're in trouble, and immediately abort.

Caboose: *holding the bomb* I think that's a good plan.

Grif: Sarge, while that's the most retarded idea I've ever heard, I just wanted to thank you for not putting me in front of the line.

Sarge: Don't get misty, Francine. We'll have already killed you and used your corpse to jam up the windmill.

Grif: Wow! What a surprise!

Sarge: I think we can all agree given our current situation, it's the perfect plan.

Nobody responded with a dead silence.

Sarge: Okay, well let me tell you about my other plan. Using parts from the Warthog-

Grif just didn't listen as he turned to Steve and Tex.

Grif: I'm hoping you guys have a better idea.

Tex: We're working on it.

Steve: Best option is to sneak in and plant the bomb quietly, seeing we have the element of surprise.

Tex: And when the bomb goes off, it'll take anyone in the fortress with it! As long as we don't get spotted, it should go smoothly.

Sarge: Or we build what I like to call "the Grif Cannon."

Grif: Hoh man...

He said as he was backing away slowly and turning away.

Sarge: Utilizing the power of the Grif Cannon, we make a Grif-sized hole in the outer wall. ...Or we paint it a very disgusting colour.

Meanwhile inside the Fortress, O'Malley was ranting and laughing about something.

O'Malley: Hahaha, fools. They don't stand a chance against us, hahaha. Do they men?

Lopez: >No. We will crush them.<

Red Zealot: The Flag is on our side. We will be victorious!