Belsize Park || Kate & Leo

☆ Six ☆

We approach our house, the sun searing our eyes, and see Mia sitting on the top step and Bear running around in the little part of the front garden.

“Daddy!” Bear shoves the gate open and leaps into my arms, and I stagger backwards, catching him in my arms.
“Hi, Beary! Did you have fun with Mia?”
He nods enthusiastically, holding his pinky finger to his lips, and flickering his eyes around. I feel Joe brush past us, and watch him go past Mia and into the house. I tilt my head, gesturing to Mia, and we make our way inside.

“Daddy, did you get a cake for me?”
“I got you three.”
“Three!” He exclaims. “Can I have them now? Pleaseeeee!”
I lower him onto the floor, ruffling his hair as he runs towards the table.
“Mia I got you three too. Would you like one? They’re only little, but I thought we could save one each for pudding.”
“Yes please.”

I open the bag and pull out two cakes and hand them to Mia and Bear, sitting on a chair next to . We sit here in a contemplative silence for about five minutes until Joe comes back down, his headphones around his neck, and his hand rubbing his arm.

“Are you okay Joe?” Mia asks. “Dad bought us some cake.”
“I know. I was there.” He takes a seat, and cracks the smallest of smiles, as he reaches down into his pocket.“Bear, I just wanted to say sorry for earlier. I should have been more patient with you.” He places the box on the table, and opens it. Inside, there are photographs, rings, and a little 5ml bottle of perfume. Me and Mia exchange a wary glance as he slides the box closer to Bear. “Look inside.”
“Can I?”
“You wanted to, didn’t you?”

I hear Bear swallow beside me and his hands take out a stack of old polaroids, each of them dated with scrawly black ink. There’s about a dozen photographs of you and I on Titanic, some stills from the film, and some behind the scenes. There are photographs of our wedding, photographs of the wisterias, the pergola, and the pastel flowers around us. There are photographs you took when Mia was born, when Joe was born, and when Bear was born. The last photograph in the collection is one dated the 10th July 2020. Five days before you died. We were sitting in this lovely green park, the sunlight drowning our faces, making us glow. Me and you sprawled on this old tartan picnic blanket we bought in Mexico in 1996. Mia and Joe were standing behind us, beaming, and Bear sitting half on your lap, half on mine, his eyes closed and his toothy grin the only part of his face visible to the camera. The sky that day was a blend between cerulean and periwinkle, with a touch of yellow, and faint wisps of pink clouds crowned the hills around us. I always loved seeing the world through your eyes, it was almost more beautiful. Bear’s eyes lit up as he collected them all back together and sat them in the box. Next, he picked up some rings, and slid them onto each of his fingers, laughing gently as they all fell back off. I was wondering where all your rings had gone. I’m glad they are in safe keeping. Finally, there is a small vial of perfume, one of those 5 ml tester. Bear lifts it to his nose, and smiles.

“What is it?”
He purses his lips. “The mummy smell.” He closes it in the box and moves over to Joe, wrapping his arms tightly around him, leaning his hands on his arms as he moves closer to him. In a split second, a cloud crosses his face, and he exhales. Bear pulls away.
“Are you okay, Joey?”
He nods, and Bear cautiously moves away, handing the box back to him. I track my eyes across his face, catching his eyes as my forehead creases into a frown. “Yeah… I think I injured my arm when I hit the wall this morning.” A smile tugs his lips upwards for a split second as he catches my gaze.

Joe never hit the wall this morning. I stopped him before he could. Before he injured himself. He tugs on the cuff of his sleeve, and smiles again.

“So, cakes?”
“Cakes.” I nod, handing him a cake, getting one out of the bag for myself and taking a bite. “Mmm. The icing is nice.”
“So is the cake. Nice and fluffy.”