When The Rain Washes You Clean. (You'll Know.)

Chapter Twenty Two.

January - 1980.

One Month After Leland Came Home.

Ana.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, and letting a tired sigh slip past her lips - Ana rests her chin, in the palm of her hand; as her head continues to play out the previous conversation she just had with Leland. It feels that ever since he showed back up here, it's been a constant battle with her heart and her head. There's just some things in this world that are just so unforgivable, that no sane person would ever accept to come back into their life. It's why Ana doesn't understand how she let Leland back in so easily.

She wouldn't go as far as to say that they're romance has sparked once more, and everything was fine between them. It was far, far from that; most days Ana can't even be in the same room as Leland without wanting to scream at him. She just doesn't understand how she let him stay in this house, under the same roof as her - while she knows what he did. It seemed that every time she would try and bring up what happened, try and understand everything that went down; Leland would crumble and wallow in his own self pity over his mistakes, and she could never quite pull the full truth out of him.

It was almost easier for Ana and Leland, to pretend like nothing ever happened.

But it's still burned in her memory, seeing her fiancé pushed against a truck - while another man's hand was down his pants, and their lips were connected. It keeps her up at night sometimes as well, the scene playing out - and her heart breaking to a million pieces over it. It's the unknown that breaks her down the most, never knowing the full extent of what actually happened - and not knowing if the things he says to her now, are true or not.

When he first came back, showed up at her doorstep - she couldn't believe it. Her eyes had widened at the sight of him, and her heart beat three times faster as well. She felt the love she still had for him, stirred inside of her so intensely that she almost reached out to hug him. Leland looked like a wreck standing in front of her, his eyes bloodshot red as he practically fell to his knees. She wanted to slam the door on his face when reality all sunk in, but she also wanted him to crawl back to her. It was a confusing thing for Ana to be going through, and she remembers how when she looked back at Danny; the disappointment that washed over his face at seeing Leland, burnt her as well.

Leland begged for nearly hours that day to be let back in, come back into the house and just be with Ana in the way they've always been. But she stood her ground, and with every break of her heart - she told him that everything between them was ruined now. He cried, and so did she; but she still couldn't turn him away as much as she really wanted to. So she let him in, under the promises of Leland baring everything out to her.

She could see that he was trying, doing his absolute best to try and make things right with her; but he just wouldn't talk properly about Johnny. She would bring up the hard questions to him, and he would break so easily under it; that every word that rolled past his lips, just didn't sound so much like the truth. Not in a way, that could give Ana a clear view on what the fuck actually happened.

It's why she's currently sitting on the bed now, letting a sad noise past her lips as she shakes her head. Her heart is in two places right now, fighting from each side of the broken piece and all her head wants; is just the full fucking truth.

It's not asking for much, is it?

She wishes Danny was here, sitting next to her and comforting her in all the ways he's done before. She wants to be curled into his chest, crying freely while Danny soothes her with sweet words. It's hard facing this alone, and she knows it's only because this business is between her and Leland... But Danny was always good at calming her down, putting her on the right path and building up everything that gets knocked down. She's afraid that without his guidance, she might make the wrong choice and open her heart to Leland once more; without ever knowing the truth.