Aris Jones X Reader One Shots

Tomorrow?

Aris knew from the beginning that his emotions very well could be his downfall. If anyone knew the truth somehow, if he let one drop of how much he knew spill, that would be the end of everything. The end of every friendship that he had spent so long making, the end of everyone's trust that he had fought tooth and nail for, and the end of his relationship with Y/N that he had poured his heart and soul into.

Bottling everything up though, would do nothing but make it explode. So he found an alternative. It wasn't as effective as talking to a real human, but it was all he had.

In the beginning, there was nothing that could go wrong with it. Keeping a journal about everything he felt and all the confessions he wished he could give didn't seem like something that could backfire.

In a way, it didn't.

In hindsight, not telling Y/N he had it, as if she would invade his privacy if he said not to, was really dumb. What's even dumber? Hiding the item containing everything nobody was supposed to know on top of a cabinet that she walked past daily. So much so, that she was bound to run into it some day, causing it to fall to the ground.

While that wouldn't be a problem if he was home, he wasn't. It wasn't as if his name was on it either. Since he had never said a word about it despite the way she had explained to him that she owned a red, blue, and green one that he wasn't to touch, and seeing as the one she found was blue and the one that she misplaced was that exact same color, it was only natural for her to assume it belonged to her.

Seeing as she had the time, she opened it and started reading. As the first page she opened it to started with her name, she was almost on autopilot as her eyes scanned the words.

Immediately, she recognized it as Aris's handwriting. While she knew it'd be right to put it back she just wanted to read one page about her. After that, she would never touch it again.

Getting on her stomach, she laid on the floor and started reading.

Y/N still doesn't know. Sometimes, I think that she should. Then, I remember how that would end. I would lose her, and I can't. I won't.

Taking a breath, she stared at the wall as she tried to think about what this could mean. What could he possibly be hiding from her? For crying out loud, the things she hid from him were about private things her friends didn't want anyone to know, surprises that he would see soon enough, important life events that he was most likely there for, and vents about arguments with him or her friends. Those also were the reason she knew how to fix whatever had happened so it wasn't as if there was anything particularly nasty in there.

So maybe whatever he wrote wouldn't be that bad. Maybe it was a small thing that she could forget about. Even if her gut said otherwise.

I love my girl. I love her more than I've loved anything, and even though I write about her a lot, not every page of the universe would be enough.

Glancing at the wall again, despite the way her heart should flutter, it had sunk to her stomach. Something about the way it had been written, like it had guilt behind it, made her almost sick.

Still, she decided to ignore that feeling until something was disproven or confirmed. While she was sure of what it would be, she kept lying to herself.

That's why I think about it. If I were to tell anyone it would be her. No matter what, she's always my first option. While right now I seem to be hers, if she knew I don't think that I would be, and I can't risk finding out. I can't risk her finding out.

With each word only getting worse, she was sure that whatever the next sentence would be would be a punch in the gut. Somehow, she knew this would destroy her. Yet, having to live without finding out what he was hiding would put her in a constant state of paranoid hell. At the same time, she knew nothing would be enough preparation for what she was about to discover.