𝐃𝐄𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐘 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 | 𝐁𝐗𝐁

ＦＯＲＴＹＦＩＶＥ

I was lying on the ground for a while. I heard Kate left home early in the morning. So I didn't have to bother getting up or doing anything. I didn't go to school, I didn't answer the phone, and I did nothing but feel bad for letting Matt slip through my hands. I just wanted to get so drunk, drown all my sorrows in a bottle of wine.

"I'm sorry, Matt..." I sobbed, making a gurgling sound in my throat. My hands were on my chest, the wetness leaking from my eyes was burning my face. "That was me... I told you you were a coward, but I was the one who was afraid."

I tried to stand up, stumbling once and falling onto the couch. While doing this, my foot hit the wine bottle on the ground. I must have hit my head somewhere, I laughed to myself as I pressed my hand to the painful area. Indeed, the man I love becomes my sister's husband.

The only person I had left was Kate, and now she must have dumped me too. Apparently, she didn't even need to notify me when she did this. She was right, I hurt her badly. Unfortunately, throughout all of this, I was too blind to even stop my mind from finding its way back to Matt. I was startled by the sound of the phone on the couch.

"Hello, Sam." I pressed it to my ear as I moaned hoarsely.

"Oh my god, you sound awful. Is everything okay, Ben?"

"Of course," I said quickly. "What's up?"

"I have news for you." Her hesitant voice was uncertain. I wanted to tell her that I already knew what she was going to tell me and to keep it short, but I just waited. I did what I always do best and stayed silent and waited for her to continue. "This is about Matt and me."

I coughed lightly and cleared my throat. "I think I can guess what you're going to say. Look, Sam, is he with you now?"

"Who? Matt?" She sounded a little surprised now. "No, actually he left to have dinner with his father. To this seafood restaurant that had just opened. What was it called? Oh, um..."

"The one next to that stupid sushi place?" I cut her off without hesitation.

"Yeah, that's it... Hey Ben, look, here's what I wanted to tell you..."

"I'm sorry, Sam," I breathed hastily, "This can wait. I just remembered I have to do something... Urgently."

I ended the call and hurried to the bedroom to change into something less shabby, not caring how bad a spinning head would make me look. I opened the closet like crazy and took out a t-shirt and trousers. Throwing them on the bed, I took some time to wander around the room on my own. Right now, I would give anything for Kate to come home and save me from the terrible thing I was about to do.

Still... Any bad decision tonight was no worse than accepting that I had lost Matt for good.

Holding on to the bed, I got dressed and ran out of the building. The restaurant was ten minutes from my house, but at my current pace, let's make it twenty. 

After bumping into a few people, I apologized and quickly walked into the crowded streets. That's how a bad rain started, but I didn't care how wet I got. I decided to be that guy who owns his feelings tonight, regardless of how ridiculous it would make me look. For once, the leading role in my own life. The man who decided to do the right thing.

When I arrived at the restaurant, feeling dizzy, feeling the urge to vomit in my mouth due to the concussion with every quick step I took, and with shaking feet and drenched, I greeted the receptionist, who had fallen victim to the unfortunate practice of holding an umbrella for the customers entering.

"Good night sir, do you have a reservation for tonight?" The blonde curiously glanced at the tiny notebook in her hand.

"No," I said honestly, "I just have a friend in there and I need to see him."