the other side of the sea - reiner braun x reader.

Blame.

As soon as the meeting ends, I say my goodbyes and try to leave as fast as possible. Zeke can't be serious. He can't truly want me to go to Paradis? I haven't trained as a soldier since I was twelve years old. I'd be near useless in battle. My mind is racing a mile a minute and I haven't been paying attention to where I am.

I have walked to the pier. I am standing in the same spot I was 9 years ago when I saw my friends off to their deaths. I let out a heavy sigh. "Hey! Y/N!" I hear a familiar voice shout from behind me. I turn around and see Reiner coming towards me, trying to catch up.

"Hey Reiner" I reply, trying to hide my emotions about that bomb that was just dropped. Reiner finally catches up and stands before me. "Damn, Y/N. I forgot how fast you are" I scoff. "Running is the only training I've kept up with since we were kids."

Reiner scratches the back of his neck. "Yeah uh- it shows. Hey - look. Are you alright?" He asks. "Me? Oh yeah, I'm fine. What about you? How do you feel about going back to the island?" I ask, to try to deflect. Reiner shrugs. "I knew I would eventually have to go back someday." I sigh deeply and look out at the water. "Maybe, once this last battle is over and we have the founder back, we don't have to fight anymore. You won't have to fight anymore." I clarify. "Yeah, maybe." He says.

"Reiner, can I ask you to something?" "Sure, kid." He replies. "What do you think of this festival?" I notice Reiner tense beside me. "I uh. I'm not sure." Him saying only that confirms my suspicions. It's not a good idea to go into detail, who knows who could be listening in on this conversation, or any conversation.

I nod and give him a small smile. "I should go. I need to uh, go see my dad." "Okay. Ya. Sure." Reiner replies, and I think I hear a faint hint of disappointment in his voice. I nod and begin walking away.

"Oh! Y/N." I hear from behind me. I turn around. "I'm keeping an eye on you tomorrow, do you uh. Want to grab lunch or something?" I can't prevent the soft smile from spreading along my mouth. "Ya. Sounds good." I reply. "Okay, meet me downtown at 3." I turn to walk away. "You got it!" I shout back.

The next day, I am frantically searching for something to wear to lunch. I know this is just to appease Magath and I know that Reiner isn't going to care because he doesn't see me like that anymore, but I can't help but want to look nice. I settle on a long beige skirt, and a white off the shoulder top.

It's not anything special but it's okay for a day out I guess. I leave my hair down today for a change. I involuntarily tuck some behind my ears. I take one last look in the mirror and before I can change my mind, I leave.

I make it downtown and see that Reiner is already there. He has found us a table at a small cafe. I lift my hand to wave as I walk over to him. He nods in kind. He is leaned back in his chair, one leg overtop the other. He's wearing a white button down and black pants. He has left the first few buttons undone and I have to admit he looks great. I shake myself out of my thoughts and sit down.

"Hey kid." Reiner says. "How are you?" I ask. "I'm uh- better now." He replies. I smile back at him. I'm not sure what to talk about with him. I can still barely look him in the eye without seeing that defeated, dejected boy sitting before me as I rip into him about being a failure. A fresh wave of guilt and shame hits me and I try to shake it off.

"How do you really feel about going to Paradis?" Reiner asks quietly. I shift in my seat. "Oh I'm fine. Really." I reply unconvincingly. "Don't lie, Y/N. You're a terrible liar." I scoff. "What makes you say that??" I ask with exaggerated offence. Reiner smiles, and I realize how long it's been since I've seen him smile.