sunshine and midnight rain

Chapter 16

-Every time I meet his eyes, I fall in love a little more. How could I ever move on?

22nd of January

Megumi's pov

"Hey, guys."Ayle greeted us as Yuji and I approached him, near one of the biggest parks in our city, whose position is more central. We both greeted him back.
"How you doing?"He asked.
"Not bad, thanks."I responded.
"Yeh, kinda the same, apart from school."Ayle added, while lighting up a cigarette.
"Is it just the three of us?"Yuji asked.
"For now, but the others will soon arrive as well, not all of them though."He said while putting his left hand in his jeans' pocket and taking a look around, taking the smoke out of his mouth. "Two or three people are gonna join us later, while we're around."
"How many people will there be?"I asked.
"Apart from the three of us, in five or ten minutes are gonna arrive Lea, Kiyoshi, Koyo and Mia, she wasn't having lunch with us a week ago, so I don't think you know who she is."He stated while looking at us, taking a puff.
"Eh, we might know who she is."I said, while looking at the ground.
"Really?"Yuji asked me after turning towards me,  looking confused.
"I don't know if we are talking about the same person though."I added more quietly. "She might be one of the girls of Nobara's friend group, she was at the New Year's party, does that remind you something?"I asked him.
"Oh, yeah, but we probably didn't see her that night."Yuji stated while looking at the ground thinking. "Oh, yeah, Nobara, a friend of ours, described her to us, but I honestly don't remember how she looks like."He explained, looking at Ayle. "Yet, I'm still not sure if we are talking about the same person."He added chuckling. Gorgeous smile.
"I-"I started saying, getting interrupted.
"I was at that party as well. I don't remember seeing you though, but there were so many people that it was practically impossible."Ayle stated, chuckling as well, again taking another puff.
"We might be talking about the same person then."Yuji said.
"I remember the description Nobara gave us of her, does she have long, black hair?"I asked.
"Yeh, she's also very reserved, but she knows lots of people. She might have also mentioned that girl Nobara sometime, it's not the first time I've heard of it."
"I think we are talking about her then."I eventually stated. After that, Lea showed up, greeting all of us with her same sweet behaviour. Soon after, Koyo and Kiyoshi joined us.
"Is there someone missing?"Koyo asked.
"Mia, she must be here in two minutes."Lea said, while texting.
"Who's gonna join us after?"Kiyoshi asked.
"Uh..well, Sakura, Grace and-"I didn't follow any further. Yuji immediately understood and we both exchanged a look of consciousness, he could understand that more than anyone else could. I sighed, starting to look at the ground. I sighed
"Hi, guys!"Mia came and greeted all of us, smiling brightly.
"Well, let's go then, shall we?"Ayle asked, smiling as well.
"Sure!"Lea answered. We started walking around the park, joking and laughing all together. Yuji was just beside me, closer than anyone else.
"Megumi, maybe she isn't the Grace we think about."Yuji whispered.
"There aren't many Graces here, Yuji. And it is highly probable that it is her, she also know lost of people and moreover she was at that fucking party. Also considering that she's in Maki's class."I whispered back, looking at him from the side. "But, Yuji, don't worry really, I'm not letting the thought of seeing her ruin this afternoon."I added. "And you are with me, I know I'm safe in any case, the thought of her doesn't even bother me now that you are here."He listened to me carefully, getting out those words wasn't expected. He blushed, while smiling, and looked at his side.
"Okay then, I trust you."He whispered back, looking again into my eyes, showing a smile from cheek to cheek. A small smile escaped my lips as well, he didn't seem to notice it though. I had the urge to kiss him, his lips and smile offered an invite that I could hardly decline, but I had to. I licked my lips and tried focusing on something else as we walked, chatting with the whole group. The walk in the park lasted a good thirty minutes, as we eventually decided to exit and started wandering around the busy streets. Soon another girl joined us, and I understood that she was the Sakura Lea had mentioned before. She seemed friendly and kind, it was not bad having her in the group. She's a bit extravagant but I didn't mind that too much, I honestly think that those kinds of people are more interesting than others. We reached a traffic light at a crossing, and stopped, we were waiting for someone. I took a look at my phone as the conversations went on. Both Yuji and I got closer to Lea and Ayle particularly, but overall with all of them, it's a nice group.
"Yo, after Grace and Atlas arrive, we're gonna go to a cafe, is that alright?" Kiyoshi asked. So, Atlas, that was the other person's name, a guy.
"Yeh, that'll be fine."Koyo answered.
"Yeah. it's the same for me."Lea said.
"Yes."Mia stated.
We walked towards the city centre, boutique shops streets making their way into our view. That day was cloudy like the others, and a cold wind beat our cheeks, branches and leaves. I walked with my hands in my pockets and the turtle neck of my jacket hosted part of my face.
"We have the Chemistry test next week, right?"Lea asked, referring to Ayle and Koyo, being in the same class.
"Yep."Koyo responded.
"I'm not coming to school."Ayle added.
"Oh, com'on, you can't avoid every test we have, you know."Koyo said. Ayle sighed loudly. We reached another huge park, this one placed at the very centre of the city.
"Well, Grace and Atlas should be here in two minutes or so."Lea stated, after taking a look at her phone.
"Atlas is a great name, isn't it?"Yuji asked.
"I like it a lot."Sakura said.
"Yeh."Ayle said. Mia, Koyo and Kiyoshi sat down at a bench while we surrounded them.
"Hey, guys!"We heard from behind. Impossible not to recognize that silly voice.
"Hey."That guy, Atlas, must have said.
"Yooo."Ayle greeted them.
"Hi, guys! I've missed you, Grace."Lea said cheerfully, embracing her. I honestly do not understand how you could miss someone like Grace but I was not there to judge. With the others she's probably different and not as annoying as she is with me, hopefully. She's objectively a pretty girl, even stunning, but her character says it all.
"I'm happy to see you all!"She added.
"Well, shall we go to a cafe now?"Koyo asked.
"Sure." We started walking towards a not-too-fancy cafe, one of the most populars here in town, due to its welcoming and comfortable atmosphere. Grace walked beside Lea while everyone talked with each other. Yuji and I joked with each other and had fun with the group while reaching the cafe. I felt someone's stare at me all the time but I tried not to pay too much attention. We entered and after being warmly welcomed by three waitresses, we sat down at the bottom of the room, adorned by an enormous window that let us observe the backyard of the cafe, another reason why it is so loved. The table was surrounded almost totally by a sofa. Yuji and I sat down beside each other, next to him Ayle and then Lea. Beside me, ironically, sat Grace, purposely. Next to her is Sakura and then Atlas. I moved closer to Yuji without making it too obvious to the others that I tried to get as far as I could from her, they probably don't know how she behaves when we are alone. Yuji noticed and looked at me worriedly, probably thinking that would have ruined the whole event. I reassured him with a look, making him understand that Grace would have ruined nothing, it was just annoying. We all started looking at the menu, even though I already had a clear idea of what I wanted.
"Do you already know what you're gonna get, guys?"Ayle asked, looking at us.
"Ye."I blandly responded.
"Damn, bro, chill, how fast."Ayle responded quietly and joking.
"What are you gonna get, Megumi?"Grace asked, turning towards me.
"A black coffee and  a piece of vanilla cheesecake."I responded without giving her a look.
"How elegant."She stated smiling. At her statement I gave a side eye to Yuji who let out a silent chuckle, while I was just more annoyed. She just had to shut the hell up.
"Are you ready to order?"A small, red haired girl asked us, one of the waitresses.
"Not all of us."Koyo responded smiling.
"I'll come back in a few minutes."She said, smiling as well. We all ordered and then waited for the orders to come.
"Yo, I heard that Asuke got a girlfriend."Atlas said.
"What?"Lea asked. "I hung out yesterday with Chloe, we saw him around here but he was alone. We usually talk at school but he told me nothing."
"It's not like he has to tell you."Grace said kindly.
"Yeah, I know, but I didn't expect that. He had never even mentioned  something like that."She responded.
"If you usually talk regularly it's strange he told you nothing but Grace's right, it's not like he had to tell you."Kiyoshi said.
"How about we hang out next week too?"Sakura suggested.
"Could go."Atlas stated.
"I'm starving."Grace said.
"Me too! I can't wait till the food arrives."Lea added. It arrived soon after. Everyone continued then their conversation with someone, it's inevitable when you are in a big group.
"Do you like it, Megumi?"Yuji asked me.
"Yeah, it's pretty good. It's yours?"
"Yes, fantastic."
"This is the first time you come here, right?"
"Yes."
"This is a pretty popular place here, it's always full of people."
"I think someone told me about this place, its name reminds me of something."
"Ye, could be."
"So..." We both turned our heads. "How you doing, Megumi, Yuji?" It was her.
"Fine."I answered for both of us, boringly.
"I see you're doing pretty fine, you both seem well."She answered smiling. "It was great seeing the both of you, I don't usually see you at school." Bullshit. She said, hazarding a move and placing her left hand on the top of my right one. I sighed.
"Grace, please, just don't."I quite harshly took my hand away. She looked not only disappointed, but kinda sad, as if she didn't expect that, eyes widened.
"Can I talk to you for a second?"She asked me more quietly, with the same, almost worried, expression.
"Grace, there's literally fucking nothing to talk about. I don't know what you are on to."I spat.
"There is!"She said, sadly. I looked at her stunned, wondering what the fuck was going on with her. Why she changed attitude so fast, why she looked like she was about to cry, and what she had to tell me. Meanwhile Yuji listened, probably more confused than me. "Megumi, please...can I talk to you for a sec?"She asked me silently.
"What the fuck."I said annoyingly as I stood up, indirectly meaning that we were going out to talk.
"Yo, where are you going? Don't tell me you are going to the toilet to make out." Kiyoshi stated smirking. I sighed to keep me from saying things that might hurt him.
"No, we are going out to breathe some fresh air and smoke a little."I said.
"Oh, I'm coming with you."Ayle said, immediately standing up.
"No-"I tried saying.
"Wait, Ayle." Grace stopped him. "Megumi and I gotta talk about a school project, it's a pretty complicated one and it might take some time." That was the first time I currently thought she did something smart, but I knew she was.
"Well, no prob, I'm coming with you without disturbing you, I'll stay out of the way."I sighed again, looking at the ground. "I'll just smoke a cigarette and then come back inside, even if it might take you more time, don't worry."
"Fine."I said, defeated. Grace observed the situation with the same stunned expression. We started walking towards the exit, but before that, I gave Yuji a reassuring look, in order to explain to him that he didn't have to worry. He gave me a look that I didn't expect, he was worried due to the strange situation, but he didn't doubt me, he had trust in me, he knew that he could trust me and my actions. That filled my heart, and as we came out of the cafe, I could feel my heart a little bit lighter. Ayle in fact stood far from us, something like three metres. The only problem could have been if he asked why we weren't smoking, but we could have told him that we would have done that later, after discussing the "school project".
"What do you want to talk about?" I asked quietly, so that Ayle could not hear us.
"I'm gonna tell you all when Ayle comes back inside."I started to get annoyed.
"So what the fuck are we doing here now? Do you want me to just fake that school project thing and act like you don't have to tell me I don't even know what?"I spat, quietly.
"Megumi, please...just have patience okay? It's important."I sighed.
"If that was so important then you could have just acted normally without playing dumb all the time and just avoid provoking me every fucking time."I spat, again.
"I'm gonna explain everything to you, just have fucking patience."She started getting annoyed too, we both seemed a bit at our limit. She crossed her arms and looked around, breathing calmly. Meanwhile Ayle continued smoking. After two minutes he finished his cigarette and came back inside, saying that he would have waited for us inside with the others.
"So, now, explain."I said, with a normal tone of voice.
"I don't even know how to start."
"Grace, just make this quick, I'm not in the mood to stay here and talk about whatever makes you behave in such a bitchy way."That was harsh, she seemed hurt.
"Megumi I-", ..., "I just like you so much okay? And behaving that way seemed like the only way I could get your attention."She looked at me with teary eyes.
"That fucking makes no sense, tell me something more sensible."
"That's the fucking truth, Megumi!"She said, raising her voice in desperation.
"Why the fuck are you about to cry?"I raised my voice too.
"Because I'm tired, okay? I'm tired of these unrequited feelings!" I stood in silence.
"Don't expect someone to like you just because you try in every way possible to please him and get his attention. That's not the right way to make a person feel interested in you."I said after a while, in a calm, quiet voice. She let out a sob. "I don't like you, Grace, and I don't think I ever will."I said, looking at her in the eyes. "I know that hearing those words is fucking tough and hurtful but that's the truth. Just move on."I know that maybe it would have been better to say that in a gentler way, but the truth is that all those things I said were what I thought of her and that was actually the only way she could have moved on. If you confess to someone you like so much and he apologises and tries to reassure you in a kind way, even after you had tried millions of times to make him like you, you'll have that faith that'll make you believe that one day you may be together. The way I did it is harsher, but perhaps the best way someone could move on.
"Is there any way I can make you like me?"
"No, actually, I like someone else."
"Like you told me at the party..."She added quietly. We didn't say anything for about a minute.
"Is it Yuji?"She asked quietly.
"Why are you asking?"
"I don't know, I'm trying to figure it out. You seem to have a deep affection for the other and I don't know, I was just tryna guess." She looked at the ground at her right. "You just...seem so close. Friends can be close but your eyes speak for you."I remained silent.
"We're just good friends, nothing more, nothing less." I said, looking at the ground.
"Oh, sorry then."She said quietly. "I like you a lot, Megumi. Really. I don't know which person has your interest but they are very lucky. I'm not gonna lie, I wish that was me."She let out a bitter chuckle. "Fuck it."She added.
"You'll find the right person sooner or later."
"Well, no, shit Sherlock, everyone says that to me."She spat. "I fucking wish that person was you. I fucking imagined an actual future with you, Megumi. You know I tried in every way to get to you."
"Yeah,  truth is you did it in the wrong way."I started getting annoyed again.
"I fucking know."We stood in silence. After a while she sighed and pulled out a cigarette, smoking in silence, probably trying to get out all the stress, annoyance and anger.
"Let's go back inside."She said after she had finished. We came back inside and came back at our table.
"That took you a while."Sakura stated.
"Well, yeah, the school project thing was kinda long to discuss and organise, at least we smoked a little."I lied. I sat down next to Yuji and after I made sure the dust had settled, I turned towards him.
"What happened?"He whispered.
"I'm gonna tell you when we are alone, but she practically broke down."I whispered back.
"Why?"
"She likes me and is tired that I don't like her back."
"Fuck."He said, turning back around.
"I had told her that I like someone else and she asked if it was you."
"What?"He asked, a bit incredulous, turning again.
"Yeah, but I denied. We haven't told anyone about this and she's probably one of the worst people that could find out  before we tell anyone else."
"Yeah."He turned his head, staring at the table.
"What's the project about, 'Gumi?"Koyo asked.
"Uh, science."
"Which topic?" Fuck.
"Chemistry, periodic table and shit."I stated.
"Yeah, interesting, isn't it?"Grace said.
"I like that a lot!"Lea said.
"Yep."Sakura. I noticed Yuji looking a bit nervous, so I thought about an excuse to talk to him for a little privately. We couldn't go out again, neither going to the toilet, that would have been too strange. I sighed, biting my lip in concentration.
"Yuji and I are gonna order something else." He turned to me confused. I stood up. "At the counter."I added.
"One of the waitresses should pass by here in a few minutes."Koyo said.
"Yeh, but it's better going to the counter, it's quicker. Let's go, Yuji."He stood up and understood I wanted to talk with him. We started walking towards the counter, luckily far from our table.
"Why did you do that?"He asked me.
"You looked nervous, I guess you wanted to talk a bit about this Grace thing. It bothers you, doesn't it?"
"I guess you know me too well."He said quietly. "Could you tell me more details?" We reached the counter. I leaned against it and faced Yuji.
"What bothers you?"He looked at my feet.
"Did she find out?"He looked at me.
"I denied everything and furthermore she sounded way too drowned in her own feelings. She had told me that the person I like is lucky and she wished it was her. She told me she imagined a future with me but I totally refused her, I hope for the real last time, this time."I looked at him, he seemed to calm down a little, even if I'm sure that her feelings for me and her words had made him feel something.
"But, sorry, what if she finds out?"He asked, insecure.
"Look, Yuji, I'm su-"
"Welcome, how can I help you?"An average old woman asked from behind the counter.
"Hi, we'd like a chocolate croissant and a fresh-squeezed juice. That's all, thank you."I ordered for both of us. I turned back around.
"Yuji, I'm sure she already suspects that, okay? She's not dumb, she probably imagines I told everyone that we were going to order something else just to talk privately with you. But, you see, she might have trusted me before and suspect nothing, I had told her we are good friends and nothing more."I stated. "So, just, stop worrying over her, trust me. I told her to move on and that I will probably never like her, it's time for her to search for someone fucking else."I stared at his eyes. "Let's take the second option as the best and let's stop worrying about her."
"Okay, thank you..."He added quietly. Meanwhile, our orders arrived.