Desperate Measures

Can't Give It Up

The next morning

I turned over in the bed I was in as I grabbed onto a pillow as I slowly woke up to the sound of someone's alarm as I know it's not mine. "Shit sorry I woke you man." I could hear Matt talking as I heard him get up as I struggled to even sit up. "How are you feeling? Worse or better?" He said as I did finally manage to sit up in bed which made the dizziness come back with a vengeance. "Worse...everything spins man. How did you even get me into the room?" I said as he walked over with a glass of water and my two pill bottles. "Here take one of this one and half of this one and it might help. Are you sure you still want to do this show tonight?" I took the glass of water taking my pills then laying back down.

"Yeah just let the meds kick in...I've played through worse conditions before. Hey can you pass me my phone please?" He nodded handing my phone to me as I scrolled through the messages and that girl did text me. Not gonna lie I was totally strung out on meds when I did that.

Enaia: hey dunno if you remember me but I'm the girl who helped you to the pharmacy last night after bumping into your head. Hope you're doing okay

Josh: hey yeah I remember your cool bright red hair that's like fire. I'm doing meh but I'll be ok

"No way she actually texted you back? And for the getting you up here I carried you from the car with Amanda's help then she went to go hang with some friends so I crashed here." Wait she was supposed to come back right? Shit if she didn't come back then fuck. I nodded facepalming. "Did she say that she was coming back or? Cause Matt she's done this before. Went out to a bar while I'm home or in the studio and ends up doing some guy in a bathroom." He sighed sitting near me on the bed placing his hand on my arm. "Josh she loves you why would you think she's cheating on you?" I sighed pulling up a text from a few years ago she sent me on accident showing Matt. "She sent this to me which clearly I'm not some guy named Carlos. She's done this before...I gotta end it I mean we both want different things." He started reading the image as his jaw just dropped. "I mean you could just talk it out with." That's when we heard the door unlocking. And it was probably Amanda as she has a key to the room probably.

When she opened the door she gave me this look of guilt and sadness. "What did you just say when I was looking for the room key about wanting to end it?! Matt can you give us some privacy please?" He nodded getting up and leaving the room as she took off her purse and her jacket setting it down on the chair as I sat up as I wasn't feeling as dizzy at the moment. "I was just talking about Matt about our fight before I left for this tour. And why do you have this guilty look on your face?" I don't know why but I just have this gut feeling that she slept with someone last night. "Um it's nothing and if you want a break we can take a break. Like I want to settle down with you and have your kids but clearly you don't want that!" She yelled a little as I saw something fall out of her jacket pocket.

"Yeah cause I have shit genes and I'm home what three to four months out of the year?! It's not what I want Amanda." I got up from the bed seeing what fell out of her pocket as it was a used condom. "And why don't you explain why this fell out of your fucking jacket pocket?! Clearly we didn't have sex last night so just admit it you slept with someone!" I said as I was pretty pissed off and heartbroken as she promised she wouldn't hurt me like that again. "Okay fine I got drunk met a guy and slept with him! And why don't you ever think about what I want?! Maybe I want you to slow down after this tour and to think to start slowing down with the music and settle down with me." I just gave her this cold hard glare as I was so fucking mad at her for cheating on me again.

"You fucking promised that you wouldn't do this again! But here we are again with your slut self. And why would I want to stop while my band is at the peak right now?! I don't want to stop singing just cause you want a family Amanda! And why would I have a child with someone or fuck even marry someone who is a hardcore cheater..." I said with a shit ton of anger in my voice as I tossed the stupid fucking condom in the trash. "You do not get to call me a slut when you hardly pay attention to me at home! I needed someone and you weren't there." She said poking her finger in my face. "Please it's not like you haven't done the same thing in the past." I just scoffed as I would never hurt her the way she hurt me as I just started tearing up. "But I would never in a million years hurt you the way you hurt me. So I'm done Amanda I can't keep doing this not anymore." I said walking into the bathroom to take a moment to myself as I just needed a moment to break.