Here And Now

EPILOGUE: PART 2

Wedding Day

Weston

I stand in the back of the venue, hidden behind a curtain, my eyes fixed on the love of my life, April. It has been two long years since our divorce, yet the pain still feels fresh, raw, and unhealed. I promised myself that I would move on, but watching April in her bridal gown, radiant and happy, is a brutal reminder that I just can't, not from her. 

The music seems to echo through my skull, each note a reminder of what I lost. I shouldn't be here. I wasn't invited, and yet, here I am, watching her marry someone else. Watching her walk toward him.

She's stunning. She always was, but today, she's something else entirely—radiant, more beautiful than I remember. Her white dress clings to her in all the right places, the lace at the sleeves just a hint of the woman I once knew. She's not mine anymore. I lost the right to even imagine that she could be.

The aisle stretches out before her, long and endless. I don't know how she's walking so steadily, so sure of herself, while I feel like I'm drowning. My hands tremble at my sides, clenched into fists that ache with everything I can't say, can't undo. I see my daughter at the front, tossing petals with all the innocence in the world, the way she always used to. She's smiling, her little dress bouncing with each step.

I remember the conversation I had two months ago when I had my kids over for the weekend. 

"Daddy? Can I ask you something?" 

"Of course sweetheart." I had hummed as I helped Dex build his lego set. Moments that were very few now but I cherished them, crazy how I never did when I actually had them. 

"Well, it's actually something I want to tell you."

"You can tell me anything and everything Kay-Kay."

"Momisgettingmarried."

"Not so fast, come on I couldn't even understand." I laugh at her. 

"Mom is getting married. To Jackson." 

Silence. Then blood rushing to my head. Away from my head. Ringing in my ears. 

Why am I so shocked? I knew this day was coming. Didn't I? I had morbidly held some hope in my heart still and yet...

"Dad?" Finally Kayla's scared voice brings me back.

And the minister's voice brings me back to the present.

I tear my eyes away from April, focusing on the groom instead. Him. I shouldn't hate him, he brought life and laughter back into her life after I destroyed it, I know. Believe me I know. But there's too much bitterness in me for that. He's the one she chose, the one who made her smile like she hasn't smiled in years. And when I see him standing at the altar, waiting, his eyes locked on her, I can't help but feel a sting of jealousy. It shouldn't be me standing there. I used to be the one she looked at like that. But I blew it. I destroyed it.

She reaches him finally, standing face-to-face, and I can hear the soft words of the priest starting, though the sound is muffled in my ears. "Dearly beloved..." The words sound hollow, like they're meant for someone else, not me. 

Dexter stands beside her, clutching the ring pillow with nervous hands. He looks so much like me it hurts, but the light in his eyes is different now. He's still young enough to believe in things like happy endings, things like love that lasts forever. He doesn't know what I know.

The vows start, and I watch as she speaks. Her voice trembles just slightly when she says, "I do." I can see the emotion in her eyes, the weight of the moment settling on her like a heavy cloak. I wonder if she remembers the first time we stood in front of each other, exchanging those same words. We were so sure then. I used to think we were invincible. But time, and mistakes, and my selfishness... I ruined it.