Evie | H.S |

130. Duck Egg Blue

A/N: hiiii babies. I know I've been updating my other story a bunch lately (hehe go read it if you haven't. If you like this, you'll love it), but I haven't forgotten about our little Evie May. Sending you lots of love wherever in the world you are.
Laurel x

My favourite colour was red. Closely followed by a warm muted, pastel pink. I also liked a reddish-fuchsia if I was feeling spicy. I liked other colours too for different reasons. Colour is a spectrum, each hue whispering it's own melody to the individual soul. Amidst a vast kaleidoscope of colours and shades, we all have a preference.

I found solace in the embrace of cerulean sky blue. That colour reminded me of beach days with my family as a kid and riverside walks with my best friend, Annie. Bombay Sapphire blue, though not it's official colour name, I also liked because it made me happy. That shade of blue reminded me of my gin of choice. I'd drink it with tonic water and a wedge of lemon on a summers day, surrounded by friends as we sat outside our favourite local pub in Melbourne. I loved a deep, dramatic navy blue too. That shade reminded me of the Australian night sky, littered with stars on a clear night. Some people find a dark navy sad or gloomy, so I guess it all comes down to preference. But one shade I didn't like was duck egg blue.

"You seem a little agitated" Dana observed. She sat with legs crossed in a light grey upholstered armchair opposite me. Agitated was putting it lightly. I'd swapped out my usual sugar-free vanilla syrup for whisky in this mornings coffee.

Dana was probably in her early forties, judging by the gallery of framed certifications on the wall to my left. She had blonde hair, neatly pulled off her face and clipped at the back of her head. Though she wore an orange sweater vest with dark, wide legged jeans, I couldn't help but find the situation clinical as she looked over top of her glasses frames towards me.

"I'm just nervous" I told her earnestly. It was important to me that I be as sincere and open-minded as possible going into my first therapy session, but that was easier said than done. I'd not slept for almost a week and a half since I'd booked in the appointment.

My eyes scanned over the wall behind her. There was an open window, framed by natural white linen curtains, overlooking the Hollywood hills. But it wasn't the window I was focussing on; it was the blue wall paint.

"Is-is that duck egg blue?"

As I pointed towards the wall behind her, she seemed surprised by my peculiar question. She turned her head to observe the wall and looked back to me, holding a clipboard at her lap.

"I can't be too sure, but it looks like it. This space was painted before I moved my clinic in" she told me with a curious smile and a gentle chuckle as she pushed her dark framed glasses up the bridge of her nose with a single finger.

"It's supposed to be calming...but I'm guessing that's not working on you if you're nervous...."

I took in a deep breath, my shoulders rising as my eyes continued to burn into the wall. My hand instinctively rubbed at my chest beneath my hoodie.

"The blue...it's the same as my room at the rehab centre I was in...every room at that centre actually..."

Dana nodded understandingly.

"I know we touched on a bit of that in our initial consult, but maybe this is a good place to start..."

She paused and it took me a few moments to grasp that that was her way of urging me to lead the conversation. I swallowed what felt like a cup of sand down my throat and nervously toyed with the long sleeves on Harry's jumper that well and truly covered my hands.

I only had a vague recollection of the weeks leading up to my admittance. On paper it was voluntary, but I had my heels dug in deep.

I wouldn't necessarily consider myself a party girl, though I could understand why my parents considered me as such. I just loved music so, so deeply and always wanted to be around it and a lot of the venues just happened to be bars. Alcohol became synonymous with live music and I realised at a young age I could drink most people under a table.