Ikadalawampu't Tatlong Kabanata

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Kabanata 23

Letter of confession

There he goes again, looking at me like I'm the most beautiful woman in the world.

Lantaran ang paninitig niya sa bawat galaw ko at palagi siyang nakasunod kung saan ako magpunta.

His stares were intense, causing my cheeks to be red as a tomato.

"Makoy!"

"What? Wala naman akong ginagawang masama." Ngumuso siya.

"Why do you keep staring at me?"

"Is it bad? I just can't believe you're mine." He tapped the space beside him.

We're planning to watch movies for the whole day. Hawak ko naman ang aking oras dahil wala akong trabaho, ganoon din siya. I just prepared a pitcher of juice. Um-order naman kami sa labas ng mga kutkutin.

"You're not dreaming, I'm yours." I sat beside him.

"Mahal mo talaga ako?"

Paulit - ulit niya iyong tanong, para pa rin siyang namamangha sa tuwing sasagutin ko iyon. Humarap ako sa kanya at hinalikan ko ng masuyo ang kanyang labi.

"I love you, Makoy." Pinaulanan ko ng halik ang kanyang kabuuan ng mukha.

"I'm melting..." Humawak siya sa dibdib.

Humalakhak ako sa narinig.

Gosh, he's so cute.

Pumulupot ang aking braso sa kanya.

Agad naman niyang sinuklian ang pagyakap ko at dinampian ako ng halik sa aking noo.

"Matagal na kitang minahal, okay? Even with distance, no contact, I still keep loving you. Hindi nabawasan. Mas lalo pang nadagdagan." Pinagsalikop niya ang kamay naming dalawa.

"My love for you kept me going to improve myself. Miss na miss na kita, hindi na sapat iyong updates lang ni Tita Cara, gusto ko nang umuwi para lang makita ka. But I was thinking that you wanted me to be there to improve and to grow..." Pinaglaruan niya ang aking kamay.

Inamin sa akin ni Chance na patuloy pa rin ang komunikasyon niya kay Mama para manghingi ng updates tungkol sa akin. It didn't occur to me as a surprise. I was suspecting it even before.

I just didn't ask my mother.

She didn't tell me about it.

In our household, Chance was rarely mentioned. Natatakot silang malungkot ako masyado kaya iniwasan na lang nilang banggitin ang pangalan niya sa harap ko.

"Umuwi naman ako ng isang beses... I just wanted to see you. Nakita kita kahit sa malayuan, masaya na ako."

My mouth parted at his revelation.

"You did?!" Napakamot siya sa ulo sabay tango. "Sabi ko na nga ba, edi lalo na kung nag-confess ako dati at naging tayo. Isang sabi ko lang, uuwi ka agad!"

He was just smiling. Natumbok ko naman agad ang nasa isip niya.

"But honestly, the timing wasn't right back then. Kauumpisa pa lang natin. We're both fresh grads with nothing yet..." I sighed. "I'm sorry for everything I said and done, Makoy."

Pinisil niya ang aking ilong.

"You're forgiven, Crim. Hindi naman ako nagtanim ng galit sa'yo pero pinagselosan ko talaga si Julius." He pouted.

I laughed.

"Pinagselosan mo, ikaw pala 'yong tipo niya..."

Kinagat ko ang pang-ibaba kong labi. "I was jealous of Paula, too. I was stupid and immature that's why... Pakiramdam ko mali iyong nararamdaman ko para sa'yo. I tried to get rid of it by using Julius instead I was met with a realization."

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