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23.07.14 LETS GET IT! MY ANGEL

JK POV:

I was about to perform for the Good Morning America Summer Concert Series to promote my new solo song Seven in New York. It's been forever since performing in front of my beloved ARMY. I was just coming back from a mini hiatus, so I was really nervous being out on the stage and alone.

I miss my members, BTS, so much. We've been together for 10 years. They've become more than my own family to me. They raised me. I owe everything to them and we owe everything to ARMY. We all feel this way about one another. I never take it for granted how blessed I am.

The sky was cloudy and the chances of the performance getting cancelled due to rain was a really high probability. Seriously that's always been my luck. Something tries to get in the way and I always find a way to make it happen. There was a light mist-like drizzle when I headed out to do sound check. There was a lot of back and forth whether I will be allowed to preform live or if my set will just be prerecorded for the show. They said to go ahead with sound check until we hear the final decision. I was ready to see ARMY again. I missed performing so much.

My life was in a weird place dealing with the whole Covid situation and now military enlistments right around the corner. I miss Jin so much. He enlisted in December. It's been about 7 months now, but I immediately felt his abscense. He's the oldest member and I am the youngest. I've always felt the closest to him. We fought like siblings all the time, but since day one we have always had this understanding and respect for each other. He's the one person I know will always have my back. He cares more about me than himself and vice versa. Don't get me wrong, there's a true bond between all of our members, but Jin has just always been there no matter what was going on with the group. 

Plus, he always hung out with the older ladies. I loved being his wingman. The women he attracted were easy prey for me. Being the Maknae of the group and basically the younger version of World Wide Handsome, older women immediately spread open the second I call them Noona. SMH, They know what they want and don't play all the stupid games like the chics Jimin and Tae are always around. I guess I've just always been attracted to older women.

I heard someone say, "They're ready for you." as they gestured their hands for me to get out there.

"LETS GET IT!" I yelled in my head trying to hype myself up.

The second my shoe peeked out, a wave of excited screams hit my face. My hands started to shake. I was overcome by my shyness. Man, I hate when I get like this. I lowkey pat my butt to calm my nerves and started towards the stairs. ARMY sitting on the bleachers stuck out their hands out as I walked by. I thought "Fuck it, why not" and started high fiving them as I ran by. 

My nerves faded away and I felt so happy to see all their smiling faces. They all had their cellphones out recording my every move. I made sure to stare straight into the lens of their cameras. I loved monitoring social media seeing all the content and all the loving comments. 

Being an idol was fun, but a lot of the times I feel overwhelmed. They always tell me I am too hard on myself, but the way I see it, you have to be hard on yourself because how will you ever move forward and go higher if you don't recognize you faults and where you can improve.

My first song was Euphoria and they had me start at the bleachers and make my way to the front of the stage. Then my dancers would come out and I would sing Seven and then Dynamite.

Euphoria went well. I nailed it as expected because that song is practically muscle memory to me by now. The boys always joke with me how ARMY practically faints when I pierce them with my doe eyes and sing not breaking eye contact "You are the cause of my Euphoria". NGL the feeling I get seeing how with just 30 seconds of eye contact with me, they open up like they'd do anything asked of them for a chance with me. Never fails....

As I was waiting for Seven to cue up, I felt a strong pull to right side of the stage. I had my back to ARMY and my face was up on the big screen. I could just feel this unexplainable longing like someone was calling me, not by name, but just by this intense feeling of lust and neediness. The feeling of deep, maddening, wild unforgettable sex. I felt a warm rush of blood starting to flow down my body. "Oh fuck" I thought as this is not the place or time to be getting turned on. LMAO, it was intoxicating to say the least.

I bent down and tied my shoelace. That has always been my go to trick when I needed to calm a boner down. Phew, it worked like a charm. So now I need to know what the hell just happened. What the hell was this feeling reeling me in like a fish taking the bait.

Seven came on and I finally got to turn around and investigate this situation. I immediately looked in that direction, but I didn't see anything or anyone that would be causing this feeling. The songs choreo had me center stage then I moved left and then finally dance to the right side once Latto's part comes on. Man I can't wait to see what's stirring these emotions in me. I can't remember the last time I hooked up with someone that actually excited me.

I started heading to the right and froze. I swear it was like bells went off in my head as I gazed upon the most beautiful face I have ever seen. She was prettier than me. Prettier than Taehyung. Prettier than dare I even say it, World Wide Handsome. Brian, my dancer, nudges me slightly probably wondering what I was doing . I snapped out of it and continued with my performance.

Dynamite cued up and I literally had butterflies even just thinking of making eye contact with her. My whole body felt warm and I could feel this stupid smile on my face like I just drank a whole bottle of soju. What is happening to me? What is this girl doing to me?

I was about to head to that side of the stage. Should I look? Should I not? Ah fuck it, I looked up and felt like I got blown 50 yards back. Her eyes were so fucking beautiful. They were so similar to mine. I now understood what ARMY meant when they said there are galaxies in my eyes. Her smile surrounded my heart. I couldn't look away. She's so cute and sexy and beautiful all at the same time. The same thought repeated itself, now I get what ARMY meant when they said that about me. I couldn't see anything but her. Just me and her in a crowd of thousands.

I'm devastated my performance was done. What should I do? I can't lose her. I need to talk to her. I'm freaked out.

My manager called me and my security directed me off the stage. I took one look back and she was just  standing there with a smile that makes my whole world just stop. She waved bye and I was being rushed off. I didn't get to wave back. I felt my heart tense up the farther I'm was being dragged from her. 

*** I had to story build so if you just get through the next few chapters, I promise it will get spicy once you reach the date part ***

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