THE DEVIL'S MAIDEN 2

Chapter 10: ANXIETY KICKING IN

I was on my bed sobbing and balling like a baby when I heard a subtle knock on my door.

It was one in the morning so I wondered who was at my door by this time.

I opened the door forgetting that I was crying and suprisingly it was Damien and unfortunately he saw my puffy face and his brows peaked seeing me that way.

I saw from his expression that he was concerned and he tried to step forward but I blocked him with the door and shook my head no.He was shocked by my gesture and tried to talk to me but I sniffled and told him that I was ok.

This time he didn't want to hear it and he forced himself in and dragged me towards the bed forcing me to sit down.

I tried to back away but he held me down and I reluctantly decided to obey.

Damien:El.. What's wrong?.. Please tell me.. I've been trying to communicate with you these days but you keep shutting me out.El..I'm tired of it.. please just talk to me..tell me exactly how you're feeling.. I can't live like this..

London: It's..

I took a deep breath and sighed.

London: It's nothing..just..mood swings I guess..and I'm here in Mexico after so long so I'm bound to feel emotional.

Damien didn't immediately agree with me and he stared at me trying to understand what I was saying to him but then he held my hands.. gently caressing them.

Damien: It's fine..If you don't want to tell me then it's ok..But do know that you will only hurt yourself if you keep it to yourself.. sometimes sharing how you feel with someone helps to ease the pain if not neutralize it completely.. Keep this in mind.. goodnight El.

Damien kissed my hands and forehead before leaving the room and I pondered on what he said.

He did make sense.But..I have a benevolent reason to hide my pain..My daughter.

She cannot see me in this vulnerable state.. she'll be so worried and curious to know the reason why..and I can't let that happen.

Even though I wanted Mace to move on..it hurts me to know that he now has someone else in his life..To be honest I didn't really think about that..I totally forgot about that scenario..I chose to.Then why does it hurt so much!.

I hit the flower vase on my side table to the ground in anger and it shattered into pieces then I remembered that Valora was asleep and she woke up to the loud crashing sound of the vase.

I swiftly sat beside her and caressed her head and suprisingly she noticed how puffy and scrunched up I looked and she gently sat up straight still with sleepy eyes and asked me why I was crying.

I flashed her a weak smile and told her that whenever I travelled to new places I would cry.

She looked at me for a few seconds judging my words and then burst out laughing.

Val: Mom you're so funny..how can you cry whenever you travel to a new place.. that sounds silly.

I smiled at her and laughed seeing her joyful expression and I decided to change the topic.

London:Your mom is quite weird right?..

Val: You're not weird mom..you just have weird habits that's all..

She giggled trying to control her laughter and I smiled.

London:Yeah..Weird habits and since you're my daughter you must have some of my weird habits as well.

She thought for a moment and realized that it was true.

London:I told you already Val honey.. you're me.We share a lot of things in common.You have my facial features like your eyes..nose..lips..brows and your fath..

I paused realizing that I almost said the word father.

London:I mean your physical appearance you look a lot like me and you behave like me too.

Val:Hmmm...You are right yes..but I'm still a bit different.

London: Well of course honey.. it's good to be different..

Val:I also have dad's features as well that's what you told me and I saw a glimpse of him in my dream once..

She smiled as she spoke and I felt extremely anxious.

Val:I have his smile.

When she smiled I saw what she said.She did have his smile..that beautiful dimpled smile that Mace would always show me..I saw it in her and I smiled back at her and hugged her still feeling worried and anxious.