This is my first time writing a story so constructive criticism is allowed!
ɢɪʏᴜᴜ ᴛᴏᴍɪᴏᴋᴀ, ꜱᴀɴᴇᴍɪ ꜱʜɪɴᴀᴢᴜɢᴀᴡᴀ'ꜱ ᴇɴᴇᴍʏ ʏᴇᴛ ᴡʜʏ ᴅᴏᴇꜱ ʜᴇ ꜰᴇᴇʟ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴛʜᴀɴ ʜᴀᴛʀᴇᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ʜɪᴍ?
⚠️ WARNING ⚠️: suicide attempts, sh, anorexia, bulimia, (smut potentially)
He found out. How could I be so careless to let him reveal what I'd been hiding. I'm so stupid. Anyone else could've made it undetectable. But no. Not me. I just had to mess things up.
Luckily he isn't going to take me to Kocho, I can't even begin to imagine what she'd do. She's unpredictable. Talking with her is similar to being in a board game and not knowing any of the rules - or where to go.
My hands feel sweaty and I rub them on the borrowed pyjama pants, what is Sanemi going to do..is he going to yell, throw hands? Insult me? Probably. But then again he can be caring..and flirty. I hated how he brought the memory of him giving me a handjob back into my head. I feel disgusting.
But I do seem to care about him, atleast a bit. He could be faking. Would he do that though? I recall the phone call, the way he was mad at me, he was thinking that I was faking.
It's too complicated. I don't want to think. My thoughts are one of the things I despise most about myself. Sometimes I want to take my brain and throw it across the room.
I feel weight gain onto the couch I'm sat on, obviously Sanemi sitting next to me. Guilt consumes me as I avoid even a brief moment to look at him.
I opened my mouth to speak but I feel two rough arms snake around my torso and bring me closer to his body heat. He was hugging me. I don't think anyone has hugged me when I was sad since..Sabito.
In a way, Sanemi reminds me of Sabito. Maybe it's the alliteration or the scars. Could be the attitude aswell.
I got as dragged out of my thoughts when his arms unwrap around me, that gives me a feeling of comfort and I look up at him.
"I don't want you to lose your strength, could be a small loss to the corps. So I guess, if you want, you can just tell me when you want to throw up. Maybe I could help you?"
I nod in agreement.
I believe I can do it but then again things are easier said than done. Deep down I know that I probably won't even try to tell. After all there is nothing he can do, he can't force me to stomach the food.
"I'm going to take a shower, you can watch a movie in my room or something."
I watch as he walks into the bathroom and out of my sight before I walk toward his room and sit on the edge of the bed.
When he hugged me he didn't reek anymore, thankfully he's finally taking care of his hygiene. Whilst I was in the bathroom I saw a large tub of hair gel for his hair. No doubt that it's probably really crunchy. It's obvious that it's always in his hair, just to make it look more intimidating. It kinda works.
My thoughts were interrupted as Sanemi walked in, that was quick. Almost too quick. Or had I just been thinking for a while? It doesn't matter anyhow.
He collapses onto his bed and groaned before he patted the spot next to him and I hesitantly crawled into the spot and laid down, my body hit the mattress like a ton of bricks before I immediately sat up when I remembered last time I was in his bed I had found dirty - and I hate to say - crunchy socks.
"Um Sanemi? Are you sure there's no uhm..crunchy socks in your bed again?"
"I dunno. There's a high chance"
I grimace and see him silently laughing out of the corner of my eye. My hand then goes under the duvet and teachers around, trying to check. I didn't seem to be finding anything but when I laid back down something pricked my back and I sit up once again. Sanemi has a lazy smirk on his face as I check what jabbed my back.
An old toenail clipping.
Oh my days.
"You know, if you're hungry there might be an old chicken leg somewhere in here."
An old chicken leg? Does he have no respect for where he sleeps.
"You eat in your bed?"
"Yeah. I cant be arsed to eat at the table sometimes. Just lay back down, we're going to watch a movie."
I reluctantly lay back down as he picks a movie and I PRAY that I don't find any other 'fun' surprises in his bed.
WORD COUNT: 774
New chapter is finally written omg. I hope y'all get the reference back to one of the earlier chapters. Sanemi having a messy bedroom is one of my favourite hc that I made up 😭
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This is how I looked whilst watching the new kny episode last night.
